Norway is the happiest country on Earth, according to the 2017 World Happiness Report. Not far behind Norway are Denmark, Iceland, Switzerland and Finland. The next five are the Netherlands, Canada, New Zealand, Australia and Sweden. The United States came in at No. 14 (out of 155).
This got me to thinking about what makes for happiness?
As far back as the 1960s, when Transactional Analysis (Im OK, Youre OK) and gestalt theories were in full bloom, I was fascinated by the various concepts of behavioral psychology. I attended workshops on T/A, had the rare pleasure of taking courses at Union College with the noted Professor Clare Graves, read widely the teachings of Maslow, et al., and eventually added a degree with a focus on behavioral science.
Among the various aspects of this field of study are concepts of individualistic veusus. social behavior. Dr. Graves has published extensive research on the maturing of the human brain, which featured cycling between individualistic and social behavior through eight stages. Noted cultural anthropologist Margaret Mead published a study of eight cultures, half of which she considered wholesome and the others remembered as unwholesome. She searched for commonalities among the four better societies and among the four worse ones. What she found was that the better ones exhibited greater social tendencies, working together for the common good, as opposed to individualistic behavior more of a dog-eat-dog culture.
To attempt to condense the findings of all of the research on human behavior would be well above my pay grade and futile within a 700-word limit. But I am moved to share a simple, maybe even naive, hypothesis, derived from the studies of individualistic and social behavior.
Lets start by considering two types of people. One has a dominant personality of individuality. The other is driven by social behavior. Ill call the first one Me and the other We. The Me person leans toward a zero-sum mentality. I have to fight for my share of the pie. What someone else has is not available to me. Whereas, the We person buys into the concept that a rising tide lifts all ships. The We person believes in synergy. That is: the product of a group, working together, exceeds the sum of the individual efforts and contributions.
Its not difficult to understand why and how people operate within these two personas. Individualistic behavior is one way of coping with fear. Such a person may not trust others to be concerned with his or her welfare. Individualist behavior can be driven by insecurity feeling in danger. Or sometimes, individualistic behavior is driven by greed, the need to take whatever is up for grabs.
On the other hand, social behavior can also deal with fear and insecurity. Faced with threats, We people tend to gather together, believing that pooling skills and resources will bring greater safety and rewards to all. I realize that there are reasonable arguments in support of both philosophies and that the subject is much more complex than this.
So what does this have to do with happiness? A fundamental characteristic of the Me person is to derive pleasure from doing things that make him happy. Conversely, the We person gains pleasure out of making others happy. Its sort of a two-for-one deal. By contributing to someone elses pleasure or satisfaction, We people make themselves happy.
It surely cant be that simple. Or can it?
Relate this to governance. With a Me focus, a nation can be prosperous, but such prosperity is only enjoyed by a small portion of the population. As a result, only a small group experiences happiness and those who, for a multitude of possible reasons, cannot reap the rewards are left to suffer. With a Me focus, a large part of the population may be overlooked by the system. Such people will fear being without a home, food, healthcare and other human essentials. This, in turn, will certainly take a toll on the nations happiness index. On the other hand, We people tend to spread the happiness around.
This brings me back to the Happiness Report. Most of the top nations in that list are ones where a We perspective dominates their societies. Can this be mere coincidence?
A Rancho Bernardo resident, Levine is a retired project management consultant and the author of three books on the subject. Reader comments, through letters to the editor, are encouraged.
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We! A recipe for happiness - The San Diego Union-Tribune
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