Some teams have resorted to utilizing cardboard cutouts of fans. Expect an army of Teddy bears, mannequins and mask-clad puppets marching up the outfield ramp soon.

The stands look like those of a last-place team in September.

With no fans in the seats at major league baseball games, home run balls just clang around in the empty seats before disappearing underneath one. Actually, it looks like giant a pinball machine out there with no one commanding the flippers.

"Tommy can you hear me?"

What a lonely baseball.

The late Detroit Tigers Hall of Fame play-by-play radio announcer Ernie Harwell used to proclaim, "A man from Kalamazoo caught that one," after a foul ball lofted into the jam-packed stands. And it sounded believable to young listeners, whom scratched their heads and wondered, "How did he know that?"

Some teams have resorted to utilizing cardboard cutouts of fans in a stark attempt to create ballpark spirit while missing the aroma of hot dogs, peanuts and liquid libations aiding their cause. Expect an army of Teddy bears, mannequins and mask-clad puppets marching up the outfield ramp real soon.

Maybe franchises could glue gloves onto those cutouts. If the ball bounces or pops in, it belongs to the lucky fan who bank-rolled the knock-off.

Companies might consider purchasing corporate sponsorship boxes and send 20 fortunate employee cutouts clad with its company logo to the game.

How about some famous fans cutouts like Bill Murray, Drew Carey, Tom Selleck and Jerry Seinfeld? Or Eminen and some rock groups to liven up luxury boxes? An Erin Andrews cutout with piped in audio could ask them some baseball trivia during a pitching change.

We need something, because when a historic blast happens, someone or something needs to field it. The fans snag and story is just as intrinsic to the event as well.

Los Angeles Angels first baseman Albert Pujols is just four home runs shy of catching Willie Mays with 660 and moving into fifth place on the all-time home run list. Barring injury or some COVID-crud, this is going down real soon.

So whos gonna catch it unless it leaves the park?

When Babe Ruth entered immortality with his 700th career blast at Navin Field in Detroit, at least 17-year-old Lenny Bielski ran it down and dove underneath a parked car to claim it. According to a 1973 Detroit Free Press interview, Bielski reminisced about the mob which immediately pursued.

"Then a lot of policemen and ushers all grabbed me. They put me on their shoulders and stopped the game and took me into the ballpark and put me in the dugout with Babe Ruth, Joe McCarthy the manager and Lou Gehrig. After the game Babe said, Im gonna give him $120. He didnt have his wallet, though, so he told Gehrig, Ill give that boy a $20 bill,'" said Bielski in the interview.

Did that moment and not-so-lonely ball mean something to him and Ruth? Well, he never spent the $20 even though it was during hub of the Great Depression.

Tigers first baseman Miguel Cabrera just passed Adrian Beltre with a home run Saturday and is 22 round-trippers shy of the exclusive 500 club. He may not have a legitimate shot at 22 on a 60-game schedule, but he needs just 15 more to catch Gehrig and Fred McGriff -- tied for 28th place on the all-time list with 493. Historically, Cabrera bashes one every 18.76 at-bats.

If Miggy hits it, someone has to fetch it, and Bielski doesnt live in the neighborhood anymore.

Maybe they could put a corporate-sponsored cardboard cutout of the Beatles out there dressed in Dr. Peppers Lonely Balls Club fans attire to get a glove on it.

Bill Kemp can be reached at Bill.Kemp@theledger.com; follow him on Twitter @BillKempSports

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Bill Kemp: Forget Whos on first, whos gonna catch it? - The Ledger