A Komodo dragon. Photo: Elizabeth White/BBC NHU 2016
Islands Season 1 Episode 1
Editor's Rating 5 stars
The breathtaking BBC series enjoyed by stoners and 8-year-olds alike is finally back, and its called Planet Earth II. After ten years, youd think they wouldve come up with a better name. Lets just say that if the BBC asked me for a suggestion, I wouldve said Our Planet Still Has Stuff on It! Who Knew!?, but they didnt, so lets get to the animals.
David Attenboroughs dulcet narration kicks in as episode one begins. Its called Islands, but it sadly does not include the private island owned by Virgin Airlines billionaire Richard Branson. (Yes, the one where he famously hosted Mariah Carey during an iconic episode of MTV Cribs.) Instead, most of these not-so-iconic islands are straight-up impossible to reach. Perhaps thats why Planet Earth took ten years to get a sequel.
We start on an island called Escudo de Veraguas. Its off the coast of Panama and home to the cutest freaking sloths Ive ever seen. They are extremely slow, much like the stereotype, until mating season. When its time to get it on, they jump right in.
On Komodo Island in Indonesia, there are living dragons. The largest living lizards on the planet, actually. And they are terrifying.
If you somehow arent convinced that dinosaurs still live among us (okay, in Indonesia), look at these two Komodo dragons go at it. You could tell me that these are characters from a reboot of It Came From the Swamp and Id believe you.
Moving along. Madagascar, one of the worlds biggest and oldest islands, is home to over 250,000 rare species including an extraordinary number of different lemurs. Heres a cute one, traveling upon his mothers back.
Then theres Fernandina, a Galapagos Island slash active volcano in the Pacific where nothing can really live. Nothing except for these seagoing iguanas, which graze the ocean floor. Look at this regular Michael Phelps do the butterfly stroke.
Other things that live on Fernandina Island: crabs that hang out on the iguanas backs and pick junk out of their scales like exfoliating facialists
and, because life just cannot be that good, Fernandina Island also has terrifying snakes that prey on newborn iguanas. The iguana hatchlings must traverse a dire stretch to reach the rocks where theyll be safe. These snakes arent stupid! Babies are easy prey.
Nature is ruthless and while Id normally show you the truth, I feel that we should end this short tale on a high note.
Curious what bird flirting looks like? Wonder no more.
(These two New Zealandbased Bullers albatross are in a long-distance relationship. That is not a joke.)
Moving on. A piece of travel advice: Never go to Christmas Island in the Indian Ocean because deep breath now it is ruled by crabs!
AHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHH.
This terrifying display is called the March of the Red Crabs. It marks the period when 50 million or so of these creepy crawlers (a.k.a. the Christmas Island red crabs) return to the sea to mate. Its famous and many people travel to Christmas Island to see it, which is a problem, Attenborough explains, because colonies of crazy yellow ants were accidentally introduced to the island via humans on boats. These crazy ants have killed roughly 15 million crabs by squirting acid into their eyes and mouths. Other ways crabs wont make it to the ocean? If you smoosh them with you car. Thats why Christmas Island rangers created crab crossings that allow them to safely travel beneath cars. If you ask me, its freakin adorable.
Perhaps the most inspiring story told in Islands is that of the Chinstrap penguins humanized to the point of practically becoming an episode of This American Life of Zavodovski Island. Zavodovski is an active volcano, and its waddling inhabitants have to daily brave the stormiest of seas to feed their young.
This looks like some sort of spring-break ritual, but I assure you that it is not.
Ah, yes, nothing like fresh fish gobbled straight from inside your daddys mouth. Next week, Planet Earth II goes to the mountains!
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Read more:
Planet Earth II Recap: The One With the Islands - Vulture
- Water Purification Island - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Private Islands: South China Sea Style - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- The Best of Fiji - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- High Cay: Bahamas - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- The World: Back on the Market - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- The Island Market is Back - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Haunted Halloween Island - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Ambergris Island Property - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Paradise Sinking - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Parrot Cay: Own a Piece of Privacy - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- An Icky Day - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- It's a Cory's! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- There she blows! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Bye bye Whale - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- No Bunting Mistake - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Whale of a time... - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Leaving day - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Look who's back... - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Lanced... - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Migrants role in... - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Pups away! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Double take - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Northerly wind blows - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Northern visitors - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Siege! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Storm time - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Storm season - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Storming over - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Sealing mission - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Still no go - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Over they go! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- All change - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Welcome back storms - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Fight club - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- V Australia to Fiji - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Tahiti Sun Travel For Sale - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Cook Islands Travel Guide - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Perfectly Frank – Fiji - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Cook Islands Tax Hike - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Easter Island Travel Guide - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Surviving Paradise - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Canada Seal Hunt ‘09 - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Tuvalu Travel Guide - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Saudi Arabian Sojourn - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Laurent Pichot on Moorea - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- The Largest Island for Sale in the World. - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Isla Kiniw: Incredible Island Rental - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Save at Sandals Resorts - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Marvelous Mediterranean: Skyropoula Island - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Branson Talks Necker Island - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Hog Island: Affordable Nova Scotia - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- The Banyan Tree: Seychelles - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Celebrity Secret Vacation Spots - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Star Island - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- 7 Islands in 7 Days - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Counting continues - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Life goes on - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Payback time - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- No let up - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Game on - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Deal or No Deal? - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Food glorious food - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Mainland beckons... - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- The tempest is coming - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Tought times ahead - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Tystie day - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Saying Goodbye...maybe - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Departure Day - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Seal pups - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Seabird Breeding Season 2009 - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- Maritime Terminal Papeete Tahiti - December 13th, 2009 [December 13th, 2009]
- A splash of colour - December 14th, 2009 [December 14th, 2009]
- Tiger Woods Wife purchases Island Retreat - December 15th, 2009 [December 15th, 2009]
- New Flights to Fiji - December 18th, 2009 [December 18th, 2009]
- Five Star Fiji - December 19th, 2009 [December 19th, 2009]
- Go Farther in Nicaragua - December 19th, 2009 [December 19th, 2009]
- Zoo Island - December 21st, 2009 [December 21st, 2009]
- Seasons Greetings 2009 - December 23rd, 2009 [December 23rd, 2009]
- Green Ark Island - December 23rd, 2009 [December 23rd, 2009]
- Merry Christmas! - December 25th, 2009 [December 25th, 2009]