Customer

I would like to cancel this server on August 20th, 2011, but not before that date. Anytime on this date will be okay.

We no longer have a need for this server and would like to cancel it before our next billing period. Thank you for your help in this matter. Please send me an email when this server has been canceled on August 20th, 2011.

She’s been with us for a long time, but things just aren’t working out … She’s become a gold digger. It’s her, not me. Please let her down easy. I don’t like punking out and having someone do my dirty work, but I’m afraid she might be violent. Diamond rings hurt when you get hit with them.

SoftLayer

I’m sorry to hear things did not work out for the two of you. While your safety is important to us, I must ask that you end this relationship via official channels.

Please submit an official cancellation request by going to Sales –> Cancel Server and proceeding through the cancellation steps. The server will be reclaimed at the end of your billing cycle on August 22nd.

Please let us know if you have any questions.

Customer

She always tried to make it hard for me to break up with her. Done!
 

SoftLayer

Glad to hear things went smoothly. Things don’t always do, but we knew you could pull through it.
 

Customer

Word to your moms I came to drop bombs, I got more rhymes than the Bible’s got Psalms.
 

SoftLayer

Thanks for your unique note, definitely was a nice break from the norm.

We’re glad to continue being part of your success!

Please contact us should future needs arise.

Customer

Thanks, it was a subtle reminder to get out your seat and jump around.