Tantric sex is an ancient Hindu practice where a slow form of sex is said to increase intimacy and create a mind-body connection that can lead to powerful orgasms.
Tantra is often misunderstood, and its easy to be taken advantage of.
TANTRA is one of those things that when dropped into conversation can leave people blushing and imagining steamy scenes from the Kama Sutra.
But its often misunderstood, and due to the intimate nature of the practice some women who visit Tantric practitioners are sexually abused.
SO WHAT IS TANTRA AND WHAT ARE ITS BENEFITS?
The ancient Hindu or Buddhist practice dates back something like 5,000 years and combines mantras, meditation, yoga and ritual with the aim to prolong lovemaking and find deeper connections and tenderness with not just your lover, but with yourself and in all of your relationships.
It can take years to fully comprehend and often involves dedicating time with a guru (teacher) in order to unravel its intricacies by studying sexual energy and how it can be applied to achieve a higher level of consciousness.
By not denying and accepting natural human desires, it can result in a positive and life changing experience, with benefits that extend far beyond the bedroom. And its not just for couples. Anyone wanting to live a more fully integrated life that encompasses their career, their family, and of course their sexuality can benefit.
One of the key motives of tantra is connection and bringing about wholeness and richness into our everyday existence. For me a big aspect of this practice is about relinquishing shame, judgment, guilt, and taboo around sex and our sexuality, says Melbourne based Tantric Facilitator, Luka Tremback.
SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD. SO WHERE CAN IT GO WRONG?
The intimate nature of how tantra is taught means that often sessions take place in private one on one lessons between a student and a guru over a long period of time, often months or even years.
The guru teaches the student by passing on their knowledge through what is known as a lineage (an ancient line of teaching that has been transferred from guru to devotees for hundreds of years).
As a result, relationships can cultivate between the student and the guru, and this is where it can become risky for the student particularly if they are new to tantra, easily manipulated or have previously suffered from abuse. In a situation like this, a guru can easily use their power to take advantage of the students trust if that is their plan.
Tantra tends to be unregulated and as sessions are often private, it means that the odds of physical, sexual, spiritual, and emotional abuse of vulnerable women and men occurring are far higher than they should be.
The practice is rife with abuse all over the world, yet due to the often subtle nature of how it happens, it means that a vast number of cases go unreported and guilty instructors are rarely convicted.
Tantric abuse comes in many shapes and forms. Extreme cases encompass sexual, physical, emotional, and spiritual abuse. The latter can be tricky to identify, but any sign that you are being made to feel disempowered is a warning sign, says Melbourne based Tantric Facilitator Luka Tremback.
It can be very subtle as many of these spiritual leaders are highly skilled in artful, colourful language to hide abuse in the name of spiritual enlightenment.
When you look at recorded cases of abuse in tantra and yoga, common themes that arise include secrecy, and threats to the victims safety if they disclose the relationship to anyone else. In many cases the instructor is having sexual relations with multiple students at once without one anothers knowledge.
In some Tantric lineages, the teacher can also manipulate a student into thinking that they need to have a sexual connection with them in order to be initiated into their line.
According to Tremback this scenario can play out quite a bit.
Say a person is seeking out a Tantric instructor and the teacher suggests a private one on one free session. The student may then be made to feel special because they are being given extra attention. If the teacher is abusing their power, they may proceed to say that they can help them if they jump on their wand of light or lingam (Sanskrit for male genitalia) because they are a man of god.
If the individual has suffered abuse previously or is new to tantra, they may think that this will fix them. For those that have previously suffered abuse, once again they find themselves in the same cycle as before they came in for healing and then ended up getting exposed to the exact same trauma.
Some people do find healing in having sexual relations with their guru but a lot of the time it is a disturbing, disempowering and manipulative experience for the gurus student, says Tremback.
HOW DO YOU FIND A TANTRIC INSTRUCTOR YOU CAN TRUST?
If a teacher is telling you that you need to do the work yourself and that they are merely there to facilitate, that is a good sign! Look for someone that encourages and reminds you that only you have the power to heal yourself.
Anyone who says I can heal you or follow steps 1-5 and then youll be sexually enlightened, or in such words (be cautious here because their language can be very artful and manipulative) probably isnt going to fix you and likely is going to take advantage of you in some shape or form, says Tremback.
Here are Trembacks key points to keep in mind when looking for an instructor:
Always do your research on a potential instructor
Speak to practitioners who have been studying with them and always get a really well informed opinion on a school or teacher, not just from one or two people, but from many.
Try out a variety of instructors and see who resonates with you
Take note if theyre using fear based language or inflicting any kind of theres something wrong with you and I can help you attitude. If youre walking out of their workshops not feeling good about yourself, then someone is tapping into your insecurities committing to them isnt a good idea.
Chat to the teacher beforehand
Always call the school or instructor beforehand to ask questions and get a feel for who they are and what it is they are offering. This initial chat should give you a sense of whether or not it is worth going in for a face-to-face meeting or trying out one of their classes.
If you or someone you know is experiencing any of these aforementioned forms of abuse, report the person/incident to the police and call 1800 Respect on 1800 737 732.
Go here to read the rest:
How Tantra can go wrong - NEWS.com.au
- The Lives of Others - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Aliens and Spiritual Enlightenment - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Dreams - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Open Your Eyes - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Spiritual Enlightenment and Grizzly Bears - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- I’m Alive! - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Seeing the World - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- First Taste of Spiritual Enlightenment - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Pause - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Welcome - November 8th, 2009 [November 8th, 2009]
- Resurrection Needed for the Catholic Church, not Jesus. Christianity, Islam ... - American Chronicle - April 5th, 2010 [April 5th, 2010]
- The Secret of Kells - Harvard Crimson - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Taylor: The true Easter within - Lake County News - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- CHOICES! Your Go To Source for Enlightenment! / Spiritual Movie Morning - WCNC (subscription) - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Sex Swami duped firangs in the US - NDTV.com - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Girls' school defies Taliban terror - Times Online - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Shen Yun Performers Present Spiritual Connotation with Life - The Epoch Times - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Yoga Draws Criticism - TopNews United States - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Banjamin Bratt: 'I Wanted to Be Anything But an Actor' - Palm Beach Post - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- The History of Buddhism - MPBN News - April 6th, 2010 [April 6th, 2010]
- Secrets of the Catholic Church - The National Law Journal - April 9th, 2010 [April 9th, 2010]
- U-Theatre of Taiwan dance troupe's West Coast debut spotlights its virtuosity - OregonLive.com - April 9th, 2010 [April 9th, 2010]
- Religion Calendar - Montreal Gazette - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- Siquijor conducts recollection for parolees - Philippine Information Agency - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- Prayer for guidance - Inquirer.net - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- East Bay Buddhist temple strives to maintain relevance in new land - San Jose Mercury News - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- Spiritual Journey: Stay-home mom Melody Melvin - The Huntsville Times - al.com (blog) - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- What Does The Buddha Have To Do With Jesus? - Huffington Post (blog) - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- Laura Dern and William H. Macy Heading to Cable - Inside TV (blog) - April 10th, 2010 [April 10th, 2010]
- American Guru Steven S. Sadleir brings Shaktipat to Spain and Italy - PR Web (press release) - April 11th, 2010 [April 11th, 2010]
- Who and What Is Buddha, Really? - Huffington Post (blog) - April 12th, 2010 [April 12th, 2010]
- The ACLU works to sap our spiritual strength - The Free Lance-Star - April 13th, 2010 [April 13th, 2010]
- Christ Enlightened, The Lost Teachings of Jesus Unveiled by Best-Selling ... - PR Web (press release) - April 13th, 2010 [April 13th, 2010]
- All About Kundalini Yoga - EmpowHer (blog) - April 14th, 2010 [April 14th, 2010]
- Catholic leadership's image tarnished by recurring scandal - Staunton News Leader - April 16th, 2010 [April 16th, 2010]
- Iowa Swami Who Beguiled the Jazz Age - New York Times - April 16th, 2010 [April 16th, 2010]
- More than a spiritual exercise - Nagaland Post - April 18th, 2010 [April 18th, 2010]
- Despite media smears, world and faithful have warmed to Benedict - Irish Times - April 18th, 2010 [April 18th, 2010]
- The Fool's Story in the Major Arcana - I-Newswire.com (press release) - April 19th, 2010 [April 19th, 2010]
- Pakistan's pre-Islamic art goes on show in Paris - DAWN.com - April 20th, 2010 [April 20th, 2010]
- New author shares emotional enlightenment - The Trinidad Guardian - April 20th, 2010 [April 20th, 2010]
- The theft of yoga - Washington Post (blog) - April 20th, 2010 [April 20th, 2010]
- Enter the Realm of the Buddha - Georgetown University The Hoya - April 22nd, 2010 [April 22nd, 2010]
- Indian guru arrested over sex scandal: Police - Montreal Gazette - April 22nd, 2010 [April 22nd, 2010]
- Life Out Here: Tea Party with a twist - Imperial Valley Press (subscription) - April 22nd, 2010 [April 22nd, 2010]
- April 25: A Turning Point for Today's China - The Epoch Times - April 22nd, 2010 [April 22nd, 2010]
- Nityananda bound devotees with non-disclosure agreements - Sify - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- Buddhist Extremists in Bangladesh Beat, Take Christians Captive - Pakistan Christian TV - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- Liberty and the Death of God - American Thinker - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- A Commentary on Religious Intolerance & the Dalai Lama - Subversify (blog) - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- The Fool's Story in the Major Arcana - BigNews.biz (press release) - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- Review: Seeking Life's Meaning - New York Times (blog) - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- An Analysis Of I Corinthians 15 - Blogger News Network (blog) - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- Luxury in spiritual Ladakh, India - Times Online - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- JD Salinger: A 'Selfish Old Goat,' But Not a Perv - Politics Daily (blog) - April 24th, 2010 [April 24th, 2010]
- Sorry, your patent on yoga has run out - Washington Post (blog) - April 25th, 2010 [April 25th, 2010]
- Leggo my ego - Winnipeg Free Press - April 25th, 2010 [April 25th, 2010]
- Church Set to Regain Museum Treasures - The Moscow Times - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- The multiple sides of Ricky Williams - San Diego Union Tribune - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- The Dalai Lama, Buddhism, and Tibet: Reflecting on a Half-Century of Change - Student Pulse - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- The Kumbh Mela: what can it teach us about mental health, consciousness and ... - Psychology Today (blog) - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS (DVD) - Film Threat - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- A Leg Up on “THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE” - FANGORIA (blog) - April 28th, 2010 [April 28th, 2010]
- The hottest docs at Hot Docs - Globe and Mail - April 29th, 2010 [April 29th, 2010]
- Florida Dems shut down state House - Politico - April 29th, 2010 [April 29th, 2010]
- Reading Energy Fields with Tanis Day - The Barrie Examiner - April 30th, 2010 [April 30th, 2010]
- Book flights to India for a luxury mountain retreat - Southall Travel - April 30th, 2010 [April 30th, 2010]
- In death, mass murderer sees freedom - Citizens Voice - April 30th, 2010 [April 30th, 2010]
- Author Becky Walsh on enlightenment through sex - Dscriber - April 30th, 2010 [April 30th, 2010]
- Is Western Christianity Suffering From Spiritual Amnesia? - Huffington Post (blog) - April 30th, 2010 [April 30th, 2010]
- The Road That Leads to Nowhere - The Road That Leads to You - New York News Today - May 2nd, 2010 [May 2nd, 2010]
- In Their Words: Her path to inner peace - Times Herald-Record - May 2nd, 2010 [May 2nd, 2010]
- Rielle, Oprah, and Zen America's Truth-Off - Politics Daily (blog) - May 3rd, 2010 [May 3rd, 2010]
- CathBlog - Newman's reasoned faith outshines postmodernism's dark stars - CathNews - May 13th, 2010 [May 13th, 2010]
- Light of the Sufis exhibit explores Islam's mystical side - Houston Chronicle - May 13th, 2010 [May 13th, 2010]
- The last word: In search of enlightenment, mindfulness and nirvana in Silicon ... - Financial Times - May 14th, 2010 [May 14th, 2010]
- 'Light in the Wilderness,' by M. Catherine Thomas - Mormon Times - May 14th, 2010 [May 14th, 2010]
- Woodrow Wilson and the Progressive-Fascist Distinction - U.S. News & World Report (blog) - May 14th, 2010 [May 14th, 2010]
- Are You Praying to the Only True God? - WEBCommentary - May 14th, 2010 [May 14th, 2010]
- Haunting 'Lourdes' Revels in the Poetry of Ambiguity - HollywoodChicago.com - May 14th, 2010 [May 14th, 2010]