It’s Been a Good Week in Video Games [Roundups]

Updates to Diablo II, porn star gamer dating tips and the total of taxpayer dollars going to funding the Army's video game—all great stories you can read over on Kotaku this week:

Dead Space 2: Multiplayer, Bigger World, Space-Floating
This could be both fun and nauseating!

Ever Wonder How Much Money Has Been Sunk Into America's Army?
You don't want to know.

Five Steps to Total Pwnage of a Gamer Girl's Heart
In case you didn't have the attention span to take all 10 prerequisite steps.

Xbox 360 Game Helps You Talk To Girls
No it doesn't.

Pokemon Teaches Your Children To Worship Satan
No no, Pokemon IS Satan.

Blizzard Patches Diablo II, Beta Test It Now
My old discs are about 5 feet away...

PlayStation Home Director Wants "Mini-MMOs" On The Service
Interesting idea.

Frankenreview: The Legend Of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
Spoiler: the reviews deem it excellent.

EA CEO: "I Think Of Pirates As A Marketplace"
A marketplace that's just been robbed.







How To Talk Amongst Yourselves Using #whitenoise [Comments]

Here at Gizmodo we've created a special place for you commenters to post just about anything you want. We call it #whitenoise and here's how to use it...

#whitenoise is your place to talk about tech, news, gossip, cow fistulas or even things completely unrelated and off-topic. So, how do you get started? Direct yourself to the #whitenoise page here. At the top of this page there's something we call the "submit box."

Click where it says "Got a tip for us?" The box will expand, letting you type whatever you'd like. To make it public, click on the button that says "share."

This will post whatever you just said into our #whitenoise page.

Also note that you can start your own threads by creating your own hashtag. Want to start up discussion on your favorite gadget? Try #favgadget. If you want your comments to appear in multiple places, use multiple hashtags. Need a starting off point? Try any of our most popular tags featured above.

Once you start participating, you'll begin to see how addictive the conversation can be. To help you keep track of your conversations, be sure to make use of the new notifications feature. Clicking on "replied" will take you to the exact comment, while clicking the link at the end takes you to the original post. It's a great way to keep track of the conversations you're having while not interrupting your regular use of the site.







Is Apple Buying VoIP Provider iCall? [Apple]

Apple is flush with cash, and as it looks like we're coming out of the recession (fingers crossed!), it's in prime position to make some acquisitions. Last week, Apple purchased music startup Lala, for example, and it was sniffing around mobile ad network AdMob before Google acquired it.

So what will Apple buy next? One reader just sent us a message that Apple is in talks to acquire VoIP company iCall in a $50 million to $60 million deal.

Is this true? iCall co-founder and CEO Arlo Gilbert, reached by phone, would not confirm or deny any talks, but that's the response he's supposed to give us. We have not yet heard back from Apple. (Anyway, everyone talks to everyone, so it's worth discussing.)

So, should Apple buy a VoiP company — the way Google, increasingly a rival — has acquired two? (GrandCentral, now Google Voice; and recently Gizmo5.)

For its long-term strategy, it makes sense for Apple to at least have a VoIP product available — even if only for defensive purposes, even if it never launches.

In the short term, it would probably piss off Apple's carrier partners, which sell the majority of Apple's iPhones, and currently make the vast majority of their revenue by selling voice phone service. But for Apple's longer term strategy, it is a good idea.

Why? It's obvious to everyone but wireless carriers that wireless carriers are increasingly becoming dumb pipes. People are sick of carriers' ridiculous fees and policies, and just want a good device that can connect to the Internet and make calls.

As data networks evolve, it will be possible to make calls as well over the Internet as by using a voice network, and cheaper. (It's already getting there.) And that's when Apple may seek to increase its control over iPhone owners — and recurring revenue from them — by becoming a VoIP service provider. Moreover, as that becomes a bigger industry, Apple should not give that business to Skype, Google, or anyone else.

So for that long-term interest, Apple may already be hiring (or acq-hiring) today.

iCall has more than 100,000 iPhone users, its CEO tells us, so it already knows the business pretty well. It also owns the trademark to "iCall," which Apple may or may not want to own. And perhaps it has executives and/or technology that Apple could want.

So whether true or not, it would not be too surprising.







Gifts to Bring to a White Elephant Party [Giftguide]

There are generally two criteria for gifts at a White Elephant/Yankee Swap party: they've gotta be cheap, and they've gotta be hilariously bad. After all, what's the point if you can't stick someone with a total garbage gift?

BTW, if you hate the gallery format as much as the Grinch hated Christmas, click here.


Prank Gift Boxes: It doesn't matter what you stuff in these hilarious boxes, because the reaction of your recipient is the real gift. Be it the Beer Beard or the Griddle Alarm, you'll be sure to make someone very, very confused 3 for $20 [Link; PrankPack]

128MB Thumb Drives: They'll be able to fill them up with almost enough data to make them useful, but not quite. That's what makes this gift extra sadistic. It's full of potential, but still just not quite useful. $10 [Amazon]

Xbox 360 HD-DVD Drive: You should be able to find these for around $20 on eBay. And hell, maybe even cheaper if it doesn't work. Whether or not it works doesn't matter, as there's no way anyone would actually use one of these embarrassing mistakes of a product.

USB Hedgehog Hand Warmer and Massager: It's a USB device! It's a hand warmer! It's a personal massager! It's a hedgehog! It's...awkward! $13 [Brando]

Burrito Glasses: I have no idea either. $15 [Etsy via Fashionably Geek]

Penis Ice Cube Tray: The "dicks in your drink" jokes just write themselves, don't they? For added Christmas Spirit, throw their old ice cube trays away so they have no choice but to use this. $9 [Amazon]

Hooper DVD: Hooper stars Burt Reynolds as "The World's Greatest Stuntman." No need to worry about this coming out on Blu-ray, as it's fucking horrible. $10 [Amazon]

Reindeer Toilet Cover: Nothing says Holiday Spirit like pooping in Blitzen's mouth. $15 [Link via Nerd Approved]

Don't forget to recommend your own favorite White Elephant in comments-include pics and pricing if possible.

All Giz Wants is our annual round-up of favorite gift ideas, including amazing attainable objects and a few far-out fantasies. We'll be popping guides catered to different interests several times per day for the next week, so keep checking back.







CoolerBot Terrorizes Woodland Creatures [Robots]

Think of CoolerBot like the paparazzi of the woods. It's solar powered and waterproof, so it stops at nothing to get that perfect shot. Of course, it looks like it should be diffusing bombs, not taking nature photography.

CoolerBot uses a tail-dragger design with 14" wheels in front and a 10" castering wheel in the rear. The caster wheel is mounted using PVC pipe. The robot is capable of moving in either direction. CoolerBot uses two NPC-41250 motors powered by a 10 amp hour 12 volt SLA battery. The logic is powered by a separate 10 amp hour 12 volt SLA battery and both batteries are recharged by the two onboard solar panels. The motors are driven by two Parallax HB-25s are which are controlled by a Propeller. Currently the robot is remote controlled through a 912 MHz Transceiver.

As far as an "arsenal" is concerned, CoolerBot is equipped with an infrared video camera and a Nikon DSLR. Check out the terror in the eyes of the bunny in the shot above. It's just waiting for a missile launcher to pop out of the cooler and reduce him to a smoking crater. At any rate, it seems like overkill unless your objective is to capture lions with their cubs or dangerously unstable celebrities. Now that is a good use for this thing...a paparazzi-bot that goes in on the really dangerous missions. [Norris Labs via Make]







AT&T SMS and Data Services Are Down in San Francisco (Updated) [Att]

Twitter user Martin Hecko says that he's received confirmation from AT&T that SMS and data service are down in San Francisco and that things will take between 24 and 48 hours to fix. Yikes! Have any of you experienced anything beyond the usual troubles with the either data or SMS today? [Martin Hecko via lkahney]

Update: Our source at AT&T tells us that GSM and EDGE are both running fine, and that the outage was caused by a hardware issue that is rapidly being fixed:

AT&T has fixed the hardware issue and data services are quickly returning to normal. Speeds should be back to normal within about a half hour.







The Week’s Best iPhone Apps [IPhone Apps]

In this week's mildly paranoid iPhone app roundup: Prices, slashed for the holidays! iPhones, recklessly tilted! Amazing classic games, handily ported! A decent camera app, sold for nothing! Cheap tickets, booked! Dictations, taken! Movies trivia, two ways! And much, much more...

This Week's Apps

If you hate hate hate galleries, click here to view the apps as a single page.

Honorable Mentions


Google Mobile: This update keeps the app from launching into Safari as much as it used to, and widens its voice capabilities. A minor but useful upgrade.

My Name and Head Shoulders Knees & Toes: I suspect most of you don't reader these roundups to find ways to entertain your children. But if you do, My Name, which will teach your tot how to spell whatever is on his birth certificate, and Head, Shoulders Knees and Toes, which makes a simple touch game out of the children's song, will distract them long enough for you to gobble up enough Zoloft to keep the gears moving without anyone noticing.

Wolfram Alpha: Once a comical $50, this mega calculator app is now a slightly less comical $20.

Monkey Ball 2: Last week, I noted that this app seemed to have a widespread crashing problem, and therefore couldn't recommend it, despite the fact that it's a worthy—if not revolutionary—followup to one of the iPhone's best launch titles. The bug has been identified: If you have a jailbroken phone, avoid this one. If you don't, and you loved Monkey Ball numero uno, give it a shot.

iClassic: Replaces your music interface with a faux-clickwheel. Jailbreak-only.

Voltron: A name and a concept worth getting excited about, let down by mediocre execution.

Aqua Forest 2: Same deal as above: A game with a pedigree and a soild concept, but on which the developers didn't quite follow through well enough.

This Week's iPhone News On Giz


Mega-iPhone Dorks Who Idolise Rambo, Strap This On For Size

Apple Countersues Nokia

Analyst Claims iPhone Users Are Suffering From "Stockholm Syndrome"

Apple Patent Shows Dock Made From 'Elastic Sponge-Like Substance' That Conforms To Shape of iPod/iPhone

In Which a Telco Executive Makes Taking Sound Like Giving

This list is in no way definitive. If you've spotted a great app that hit the store this week, give us a heads up or, better yet, your firsthand impressions in the comments. And for even more apps: see our previous weekly roundups here, and check out our Favorite iPhone Apps Directory. Have a great weekend, everybody!







Intel’s New "Pineview" Atom Processors Benchmarked, Found Disappointing [Atom]

The new Atom D410 and D510 processors were just given preliminary benchmarking tests, and the scores actually came out pretty disappointing. The older Nvidia Ion configuration actually beat the Pineview procs in most tests—not what we'd call encouraging.

Of course you don't go for an Atom for muscle, and the Pineview processors do beat the Ion in power consumption and cost (the new guys are both under $100). But we expect performance to go up as well, and the Ion mopped the floor with the D410 and D510 in most real-world applications. The Pineview procs did win in raw processing power, however. These are early tests, so take them with a grain of salt, but we'd really have preferred to see some numbers that at least beat existing configurations like Ion. [CarTFT (German PDF) and SemiAccurate via Engadget







Tech Clues That Your Spouse May Be Cheating [Gadgets]

Not that I'm condoning spying on your spouse, but we did talk about ways Tiger Woods could have avoided his current situation. If you suspect foul play, Suzanne Kantra has tips on how you can do some sleuthing with gadgets.

Granted, several of these are no brainers, like checking voicemail and cellphone addresses—but you may not have thought about E-ZPass and frequent flier accounts. Personally, I think if you feel compelled to go this far, the lack of trust in the relationship is a good sign that it is doomed anyway. Oh, and if you check browsing histories, chances are you are going to uncover some sheeeeit. It might not have anything to do with cheating, but its going to result in a big argument anyway. It's probably best not to go down that road. [Techlicious]







The Winds of War, The Sands of Time, v2.0

300pxww2_iwo_jima_flag_raising_2This is a version 2.0 of a legendary article written here back on March 19, 2006, noticed and linked by Hugh Hewitt, which led to The Futurist getting on the blogosphere map for the first time.  Less than four years have elapsed since the original publication, but the landscape of global warfare has changed substantially over this time, warranting an update to the article. 


In the mere 44 months since the original article was written, what seemed impossible has become a reality.  The US now has an upper hand against terrorist groups like Al-Qaeda, despite the seemingly impossible task of fighting suicidal terrorists.  As regular readers of The Futurist are aware, I issued a prediction in May of 2006, during the darkest days of the Iraq War, that not only would the US win, but that the year of victory would be precisely in 2008.  As events unfolded, that prediction turned out to be precisely correct.  As readers continue to ask how I was able to make such a prediction against seemingly impossible odds, I claim that it is not very difficult, once you understand the necessary conditions of war and peace within the human mind. 


Given the massive media coverage of the minutia of the Iraq War, and the fashionable fad of being opposed to it, one could be led to think that this is one of the most major wars ever fought.  Therein lies the proof that we are actually living in the most peaceful time ever in human history. 


Just a few decades ago, wars and genocides killing upwards of a million people were commonplace, with more than one often underway at once.  Remember these?


Second Congo War (1998-2002) : 3.6 million deaths


Iran-Iraq War (1980-88) : 1.5 million deaths


Soviet Invasion of Afghanistan (1979-89) : 1 million deaths


Khmer Rouge (1975-79) : 1.7 million deaths from genocide


Bangladesh Liberation War (1971) : 1.5 million deaths from genocide


Vietnam War (1957-75) : 2.4 million deaths


Korean War (1950-53) : 3 million deaths


This list is by no means complete, as wars killing fewer than one million people are not even listed.  At least 30 other wars killed over 20,000 people each, between 1945 and 1989.


If we go further back to the period from 1900-1945, we can see that multiple wars were being simultaneously fought across the world.  Going further back still, the 19th century had virtually no period without at least two major wars being fought.


We can thus conclude that by historical standards, the current Iraq War was tiny, and can barely be found on the list of historical death tolls.  That it got so much attention merely indicates how little warfare is going on in the world, and how ignorant of historical realities most people are. 


Why have so many countries quitely adapted to peaceful coexistence?  Why is a war between Britain and France, or Russia and Germany, or the US and Japan, nearly impossible today?  Why are we not seeing a year like 1979, where the entire continent of Asia threatened to fly apart due to three major events happening at once (Iranian Revolution, Soviet Invasion of Afghanistan, Chinese invasion of VietNam)? 


300pxusafb2spirit750pix We can start with the observation that never have two democratic countries, with per-capita GDPs greater than $10,000/year on a PPP basis, gone to war with each other.  The decline in warfare in Europe and Asia corelates closely with multiple countries meeting these two conditions over the last few decades, and this can continue as more countries graduate to this standard of freedom and wealth.  The chain of logic is as follows :

1) Nations with elected governments and free-market systems tend to be the overwhelming majority of countries that achieve per-capita incomes greater than $10,000/year.  Only a few petro-tyrannies are the exception to this rule. 


2) A nation with high per-capita income tends to conduct extensive trade with other nations of high prosperity, resulting in the ever-deepening integration of these economies with each other.  A war would disrupt the economies of both participants as well as those of neutral trading partners.   Since the citizens of these nations would suffer financially from such a war, it is not considered by elected officials. 


3) As more of the world's people gain a vested interest in the stability and health of the interlocking global economic system, fewer and fewer countries will consider international warfare as anything other than a lose-lose proposition.


4) More nations can experience their citizenry moving up Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, allowing knowledge-based industries thrive, and thus making international trade continuously easier and more extensive. 


5) Since economic growth is continuously accelerating, many countries have crossed the $10,000/yr barrier in just the last 20 years, and so the reduction in warfare after 1991 years has been drastic even if there was little apparent reduction over the 1900-1991 period. 

This explains the dramatic decline in war deaths across Europe, East Asia, and Latin America over the last few decades.  Thomas Friedman has a similar theory, called the Dell Theory of Conflict Prevention, wherein no two countries linked by a major supply chain/trade network (such as that of a major corporation like Dell Computer), have ever gone to war with each other, as the cost of losing the presence of major industries through war is prohibitive to both parties.  If this is the case, then the combinations of countries that could go to war with each other continues to drop quickly. 


To predict the future risk of major wars, we can begin by assessing the state of some of the largest and/or riskiest countries in the world.  Success at achieving democracy and a per-capita GDP greater that $10,000/yr are highlighted in green.  We can also throw in the UN Human Development Index, which is a composite of these two factors, and track the rate of progress of the HDI over the last 30 years.  In general, countries with scores greater than 0.850, consistent with near-universal access to consumer-class amenities, have met the aforementioned requirements of prosperity and democracy.  There are many more countries with a score greater than 0.850 today than there were in 1975.


Let's see how some select countries stack up.



War  


China : The per-capita income is rapidly closing in on the $10,000/yr threshold, but democracy is a distant dream.  I have stated that China will see a sharp economic slowdown in the next 10 years unless they permit more personal freedoms, and thus nurture entrepreneurship.  Technological forces will continue to pressure the Chinese Communist Party, and if this transition is moderately painless, the ripple effects will be seen in most of the other communist or autocratic states that China supports, and will move the world strongly towards greater peace and freedom.  The single biggest question for the world is whether China's transition happens without major shocks or bloodshed.  I am optimistic, as I believe the CCP is more interested in economic gain than clinging to an ideology and one-party rule, which is a sharp contrast from the Mao era where 40 million people died over ideology-driven economic schemes.  Cautiously optimistic. 


India : A secular democracy has existed for a long time, but economic growth lagged far behind.  Now, India is catching up, and will soon be a bulwark for democracy and stability for the whole world.  Some of the most troubled countries in the world, from Burma to Afghanistan, border India and could transition to stability and freedom under India's sphere of influence.  India is only now realizing how much the world will depend on it.  Optimistic.


Russia : A lack of progress in the HDI is a total failure, enabling many countries to overtake Russia over the last 15 years.  Putin's return to dictatorial rule is a further regression in Russia's progress.  Hopefully, energy and technology industries can help Russia increase its population growth rate, and up its HDI.  Cautiously optimistic.


Indonesia : With more Muslims than the entire Middle East put together, Indonesia took a large step towards democracy in 1999 (improving its HDI score), and is doing moderately well economically.  Economic growth needs to accelerate in order to cross $10,000/yr per capita by 2020.  Cautiously optimistic.


Pakistan : My detailed Pakistan analysis is here.  The divergence between the paths of India and Pakistan has been recognized by the US, and Pakistan, with over 50 nuclear warheads, is also where Osama bin Laden and thousands of other terrorists are currently hiding.  Any 'day of infamy' that the US encounters will inevitably be traced to individuals operating in Pakistan, which has regressed from democracy to dictatorship, and is teetering on the edge of religious fundamentalism.  The economy is growing quickly, however, and this is the only hope of averting a disaster.  Pakistan will continue to struggle between emulating the economic progress of India against descending into the dysfunction of Afghanistan.  Pessimistic.


Iraq : Although Iraq is not a large country, its importance to the world is disproportionately significant.  Bordering so many other non-democratic nations, our hard-fought victory in Iraq now places great pressure on all remaining Arab states.  The destiny of the US is also interwined with Iraq, as the outcome of the current War in Iraq will determine the ability of America to take any other action, against any other nation, in the future.  Optimistic.


Iran : Many would be surprised to learn that Iran is actually not all that poor, and the Iranian people have enough to lose that they are not keen on a large war against a US military that could dispose of Iran's military just as quickly as they did Saddam's.  However, the autocratic regime that keeps the Iranian people suppressed has brutally quashed democratic movements, most recently in the summer of 2009.  The secret to turning Iran into a democracy is its neighbor, Iraq.  If Iraq can succeed, the pressure on Iran exerted by Internet access and globalization next door will be immense.  This will continue to nibble at the edges of Iranian society, and the regime will collapse before 2015 even without a US invasion.  If Iran's leadership insists on a confrontation over their nuclear program, the regime will collapse even sooner.  Cautiously optimistic. 


So Iraq really is a keystone state, and the struggle to prevail over the forces that would derail democracy has major repurcussions for many nations.  The US, and the world, could nothave afforded for the US mission in Iraq to fail.  But after the success in Iraq, all remaining roads to disastrous tragedy lead to Pakistan.  The country in which the leadership of Al-Qaeda resides is the same country where the most prominent nuclear scientist was caught selling nuclear secrets on the black market.  This is simply the most frightening combination of circumstances that exists in the world today, far more troubling than anything directly attributable to Iran or North Korea. 


But smaller-scale terrorism is nothing new.  It just was not taken as seriously back when nations were fighting each other in much larger conflicts. The 1983 Beirut bombing that killed 241 Americans did not dominate the news for more than two weeks, as it was during the far more serious Cold War.  Today, the absence of wars between nations brings terrorism into the spotlight that it could not have previously secured. 


Wars against terrorism have been a paradigm shift, because where a war like World War II involved symmetrical warfare between declared armies, the War on Terror involves asymmetrical warfare in both directions.  Neither party has yet gained a full understanding of the power it has over the other. 


Flag_1A few terrorists with a small budget can kill thousands of innocents without confronting a military force. Guerilla warfare can tie down the mighty US military for years until the public grows weary of the stalemate, even while the US cannot permit itself to use more than a tiny fraction of its power in retaliation.  Developed nations spend vastly more money on political and media activites centered around the mere discussion of terrorism than the terrorists themselves need to finance a major attack on these nations. 


At the same time, pervasively spreading Internet access, satellite television, and consumer brands continue to disseminate globalization and lure the attention of young people in terrorist states.  We saw exactly this in Iran in the summer of 2009, where state-backed murders of civilian protesters were videotaped by cameraphone, and immediately posted online for the world to see.  This unrelentingly and irreversibly erodes the fabric of pre-modern fanaticism at almost no cost to the US and other free nations.  The efforts by fascist regimes to obstruct the mists of the information ethersphere from entering their societies is so futile as to be comical, and the Iranian regime may not survive the next uprising, when even more Iranians will have camera phones handy.  Bidirectional asymmetry is the new nature of war, and the side that learns how to harness the asymmetrical advantage it has over the other is the side that will win.


It is the wage of prosperous, happy societies to be envied, hated, and forced to withstand threats that they cannot reciprocate back onto the enemy.  The US has overcome foes as formidable as the Axis Powers and the Soviet Union, yet we managed to adapt and gain the upper hand against a pre-modern, unprofessional band of deviants that does not even have the resources of a small nation and has not invented a single technology.  The War on Terror was thus ultimately not with the terrorists, but with ourselves - our complacency, short attention spans, and propensity for fashionable ignorance over the lessons of history. 


But 44 months turned out to be a very long time, during which we went from a highly uncertain position in the War on Terror to one of distinct advantage.  Whether we continue to maintain the upper hand that we currently have, or become too complacent and let the terrorists kill a million of us in a day remains to be seen. 

Energy vs. Financials, FINAL RESULTS

Many of you may be familiar with this sectoral strategy that I have presented, which was due to the unusually wide extreme to which these two sectors had diverged from each other as of April 22, 2008. To review :


On April 22, 2008, I decided to go short on Energy (XLE) and long on Financials (XLF).


Then, on May 20, 2009, I decided to cover the Energy short, and use the proceeds to double down on Financials.  Up till that point, the trade had earned a loss of -5.36%, vs. a loss of -32.20% for the S&P500.


Now, it is time to sell the Financials position, and assess the final performance over the entire 18-month period, against the S&P 500.


Enerfin


The purple line indicates the May 20, 2009 transition from being short XLE to covering that short and using the full proceeds to double down on XLF.  Note that the short of XLE was profitable, so that the amount that was redeployed to XLF was more than the existing value of the XLF position. 


Therefore, the final results are (with all dividends reinvested) :


Enerfin2 
This strategy yielded a gain of 21.92% vs. a loss of -17.19% for the S&P500.  This is a huge gap of almost 40 points, and means that $10,000 deployed to this strategy would have yielded $12,192, vs. just $8,281 if placed in the S&P500 over this period.  Also note how the gap widened from what it was on May 20, 2009. 


This continues our track record here at The Futurist of collectively beating the market by a wide margin, with portfolios that beat the market greatly exceeding the deficit of those that do not.  Of course, these trades are for entertainment purposes only, and should not be taken as professional advice. 


Related :


A History of Stock Market Bottoms