Award-winning humor columnist Jon Dawson is no longer with The Free Press, but we are celebrating his legacy by re-running some of his greatest columns. Do you have a favorite youd like to see in print? Email Bryan C. Hanks at bryan.hanks@kinston.com. A version of todays column was originally published Thursday, May 23, 2013.

Weve all been in this situation: Youre at a party and you run into an old friend you havent seen in ages. You ask how her husbands doing, and she tells you her hubby hooked up with the baby-sitter, bought a mid-life crisis sports car and moved to Tijuana.

You vow never to start a conversation with any human ever again. People chastise you for being distant and anti-social, but youre just trying to avoid shoe polish breath.

The devastating storm that eviscerated an Oklahoma town this week brought out the best of whats left of our diluted humanity. Legions of people have volunteered their time, skills and money in an attempt to be a small bandage on a massive wound. Its impossible to believe every human on the planet would react in the manner these volunteers have, but thankfully, there seem to be more of them than the two twits Im about to tell you about.

Usually theres at least one jerk out of every 10 people. In the old days, the 90 percent who were deemed moderately decent would drown out the 10 percent jerk factor. Now, with everyone hunched over their smartphones trying to absorb every thought of every human with a social media account, any random jerk can broadcast their jerkdom to the masses.

Side note: Who has more Twitter followers? Perez Hilton an internet troll who recorded a song about gonorrhea and figured out how to make millions by criticizing people who actually have careers, or the American Red Cross a group known for helping the needy, those devastated by disaster, and members of the military and their families? If you guessed American Red Cross, then you are absolutely wrong.

As of this writing, Perez Hilton has around 5.88 million Twitter followers, while the American Red Cross currently boasts approximately 2.12 million. Maybe my 90 percent theory a few paragraphs up was incorrect after all.

The afternoon of the Oklahoma tragedy, Lizz Winstead, co-creator of Comedy Centrals The Daily Show and a noted stand-up comedian posted the following on her Twitter account:

This tornado is in Oklahoma, so clearly it has been ordered to only target conservatives.

Now what shes doing there (I think) is lampooning something Pat Robertson said about God sending hurricanes to Florida because of a gay pride parade that was going to take place in Orlando. Obviously what Robertson said was stupid, but Ill get to him in a minute.

See the original post here:

Dawson Classic Column: Freedom of speech is no excuse for speaking stupidly