My lowest memory will always be watching a match online through a live feed whilst sat with my mum as she lay in hospital, says Danny Cheetham, a 30-year-old former gambling addict.
His mum was terminally ill with cancer, but all Danny, from Stockport, could do was place bets on his phone as he sat next to her.
I thought, what am I doing? I should be talking to my mum.
The death of his mum, Christine, in 2015 was the turning point that changed Danny's life for the better. Up until then, Dannys entire daily routine revolved around gambling.
He would set his alarm at 4am to place his first bet, and would plan his route to work so he could call into a bookie which opened early for commuters.
Payday was a stressful time and the days leading up to it would cause increased stress and anxiety.
I cant remember a payday during my time gambling that I ever made it to 9am with a penny left in my bank.
The worst moments were walking into the office on payday. Everyone else was happy, buying breakfast out to celebrate. Id be wondering how I was going to get through the month with nothing in the bank.
"And because I didnt want people to know, Id find myself buying my lunch at work or going shopping. But it was just a cover story. I couldnt let anyone know I was struggling.
Over eight years, Danny had racked up 50,000 worth of debt.
He had started using fixed odds betting terminals aged 18, getting high off the excitement of chasing wins.
He gambled a lot on football, which he doesn't even like.
I'm not really a sports fan but would be betting on football matches for teams on the other side of the world, as they would be in play during the early morning hours when I was online," Danny says.
As addiction gripped him, he soon had to move back home as he was unable to pay his rent.
At his lowest, Danny thought about committing suicide to escape the pressure of it all, including payday loans with extortionate interest rates.
At one point he even wrote to loan companies, begging them not to let him borrow any more money, which he says received a mixed response.
After reaching rock bottom, Danny decided to have cognitive behavioural therapy, after which he came clean to family and friends in 2018, something he says helped me go gamble free.
It all happened so fast, but I really had no regrets about finally lifting that weight off my shoulders.
In England around 224,000 adults - the equivalent of 0.4% of the population - are classified as higher risk problem gamblers.
Two million, 3.6%, are classified as being at risk from developing a serious gambling problem, and fewer than three per cent of those affected currently receive treatment or support.
But now, a clinic for targeted treatment - the NHS Northern Gambling Service - is coming to Greater Manchester.
It's offering hope to people like Danny Cheetham, and former gambling addict James Grimes, who says it can only mean better outcomes for people like me.
James, who moved to Manchester from Norfolk, also fell prey to payday lenders. As the costs mounted up, he ended up taking 20 payday loans to try and manage his 100,000 debt.
In 2013, Jamess life was turned upside down when his father was involved in an horrific car crash. He found out he had a tumour on his pancreas and then died weeks later.
I was completely unable to cope with the onslaught of emotions. My father had been my best friend. Addiction was my escape", James said.
I realised it was easier to face losing 500 on a football game, no matter how deeply in debt I already was, than to deal with the nightmare of grief that overshadowed my family.
The final straw came two years ago on James 28th birthday, when he lost 2,000 on fixed odds betting terminals.
Realising what he had done, James shut himself in his room for three days, and vowed he couldnt continue to live like this.
When he turned his phone back on, he found he had lost his job and was bombarded with concerned texts from friends and family.
But he managed to turn his life around and last summer, walked 125 miles between eight different football stadiums, raising 4,000 for The Big Step, the charity he founded.
The Big Step encourages football clubs to consider their relationship with gambling. So James is 'delighted' to be supporting the NHS Northern Gambling Service, which aims to help thousands of people recover.
The services new base in Salford Quays will serve the north west of England, northern Midlands and north Wales.
They will work alongside teams in Leeds and Sunderland to provide care for those with severe addictions, as well as supporting people with additional and complex mental health conditions, and those who may present with more risk - such as a risk of suicide.
At Kelly Field's lowest, she considered taking her own life.
The 36-year-old mum-of-one started to use online bingo and fruit machines as a 'fun' way to escape depression, but now realises it made her mental health worse.
As she puts it, 'I didnt see myself cross the line into addiction'.
In the first six months I was already 10,000 in debt and I was borrowing more and more money on credit cards to keep gambling", she said.
At the height of her gambling, she would place bets for around eight hours a day.
Kelly kept her debt secret from her partner and would put on a smile, but over time the pressure of 70,000 debt and the lies drove her to the edge.
Kelly went to her GP to ask for help, however the counselling sessions she was initially referred to did not take place, which saw her continue to gamble until she got help from the Liverpool-based Beacon Counselling Trust.
You get trapped in a cycle, but finding the right support helped me break that cycle.
She eventually shared her story with the makers of ITVs 2019 drama Cleaning Up, where actress Sheridan Smith plays an office cleaner who turns to crime to deal with her gambling addiction.
Explaining why she shared her story, she said: There aren't as many women speaking out.
Gambling is seen as bookies and men and dogs and horses. But there are probably just as many women who are gambling addicts as men."
NHS consultant psychologist Matthew Gaskell, the clinical lead for the NHS Northern Gambling Service, said: Im delighted to be opening our new clinic in Manchester.
This will help make our service more accessible to people in the North West of England where we know there are thousands who need our support.
Gambling addiction is a new public health crisis. Its causing serious harm to thousands of people across the UK.
"This includes mental health problems, serious debt, breakdown of relationships, loss of employment, crime, homelessness and, tragically, sometimes suicide.
"However the chances of recovery from addictions like problem gambling can be very good with proper treatment.
Continued here:
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