The Straits Times Thursday, Nov 01, 2012

The momentous decision by Madam Alice Tan, 56, to give up running her spa business six months ago was triggered by a desire to care for her mother, who has severe dementia.

It has been a bittersweet journey for Madam Tan. Looking after her 80-year-old mother is a 24/7 commitment with emotionally draining responsibility that can reduce her to tears at times.

But she says she would not trade her role for the world. "I haven't been so close to my mother in over 30 years," said Madam Tan, who bathes her mother, cooks for her and sings with her.

Just a few years ago, before the onset of dementia, the daily routine for her mother, Madam Thong Yoke Yin, was a happy bustle of activity.

The sewing machine in her room was used non-stop while she sang her favourite Chinese tunes. There were also frequent excursions and karaoke sessions with her friends.

Now, the sewing machine - in mint condition - sits idle in Madam Thong's Sembawang flat. And there have been no excursions since the former seamstress was diagnosed with severe dementia about 11/2 years ago.

For caregivers like Madam Tan, focusing on the positives instead of the burden of caring for loved ones with dementia is important, said Dr Philip Yap, a senior consultant in geriatric medicine at Khoo Teck Puat Hospital (KTPH). This can "serve as a buffer against the travails of caregiving", said Dr Yap, who is Madam Thong's doctor.

To help caregivers and health-care professionals find the bright side of caring for dementia patients, KTPH is organising a programme today called Caregivers Recharge! There will be talks by experts in the medical, nursing, psychology and social work fields on topics such as finding joy despite facing hardships, dealing with family conflicts and caring for elderly patients. The talks aim to "strengthen and nourish the mental strength of the caregiver", said organiser Angeline Seah, a consultant in geriatric medicine at KTPH.

Such efforts are all the more important in view of the increase in the number of dementia patients. By 2030, more than 80,000 people - or one in 15 Singapore residents aged 60 and above - are likely to suffer from the condition, which leads to memory loss and a decline in mental ability.

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Caregivers of dementia patients, Recharge!