In June of this year, when we sold and said goodbye to our blue-shingled bungalow-style house of nine years and left Maryland for California, my family and I hadnt stepped foot inside the Oakland, California, rental we were about to move into. But it didnt matter that our living situation was about to change drastically, or that we were about to move across the countrybecause I was going home.
My husband and I started our family on the West Coast, more specifically in Southern California, where he and I met, and where I and my two daughters, who are now 10 and 12, were born. Ill forever love its tangled freeways, sherbet sunsets, and strip-mall sushi restaurants. My husband never did, and likely never will, and since Id been conditioned to believe in the American dreammarriage, children, a single-family home in the suburbsI agreed to go east, where the prescribed lifestyle wouldnt put us in debt.
We bought our standalone in 2013 and spent our days watching the kids run barefoot through our grassy yard and chase fireflies. They swung on the porch swing eating ice cream, climbed the Japanese maple in the front yard, and, during the winter, built snowmen and snow forts in the backyard.
At Quimper Village in Washington, cottage-cluster residents benefit from the workshop and consensus-driven process practiced by McCamant & Durrett and other cohousing architects.
But as they grew older, they didnt stay outside as long in the winter. My husband bemoaned having to shovel snow, and I dreaded having to wake up in the dark to de-ice the car before school drop-offs. Fall and spring were temperate and undeniably magnificent, but spring was often short-lived, giving way to brutally hot and humid summers. Playing or even sitting outside was difficult, the mosquitos merciless. I dreaded summer the most.
More troubling was that as the years wore on, the promises of homeownership started to wear thin. Demanding work weeks gave way to weekends spent in full maintaining our yard. Paychecks would go straight to repairs. Walking around the house some mornings, Id stare at paint cracks in the ceiling, a leaky washing machine, and windows that needed replacing, and feel so overwhelmed that Id want to crawl back into bed. I longed to be able to call a landlord.
Thats about the time my escapist tendencies took over. It was 2020, and I would scour Zillow for single-family homes in Oakland, where my husbands company headquarters were (and where hed be paid more), where we had family and friends, and where a multicultural population would better suit our family (my husband is Afro-Caribbean and Im of Mexican, Scottish, and Danish descent). Everything about it was inviting except for the price tags. Purchasing or renting a standalone in any highly rated public-school district was more than we wanted to pay, and a higher mortgage would mean more work, more stress, and less free time, putting us right back where we started.
Designed by Richard Renner, this coastal cohousing project in Maine consists of three connected homes with shared amenities intended for six individuals. Its small by cohousing standards but remains an effective unit for analysis.
Multifamily rentals, however, were a different story. Options on Zillow still looked relatively expensivein some cases double our Maryland mortgage. But they were cheaper than a California one, and, as renters, if a repair were needed? We could call the landlord.
It got me thinking about my familys needs and preferences for housing, and how they might figure into one of the more dense and expensive areas of California. We knew we wanted all of our interior living spaces to be private, but were happy to share the rest, like yard space, or storage areas. There was even more to gain by moving to a city setting: grocery stores, restaurants, and coffee shops within walking distance, a public transit system that granted more immediate access to museums and music venues, and, with temperate weather year round, a more outdoorsy lifestyle.
"As the years wore on, the promises of homeownership started to wear thin."
The multifamily rental we found was the top level of Victorian-style house thatd recently been remodeled and converted from a single-family residence into two units. While still living in Maryland, the landlord gave us a tour over FaceTime, explaining that a single dad and his five-year-old son live on the lower level in a two-bedroom, and that four UC Berkeley graduate students occupied the four-bedroom ADU at the rear of the backyard, which is shared by all residents. He showed us the laundry room, also shared, which was located in the main houses sizable garage, where every tenant stored things. The day after the tour, we signed a lease. I was in love.
As someone who traded in a standalone in the burbs for a unit on a multifamily property, it was validating to learn about others who are choosing to share aspects of their lives, too. In architectural historian William Richardss new book, Together by Design: The Art and Architecture of Communal Livingfrom Princeton Architectural Press, he covers nearly every corner of community-oriented lifestyles, from cottage clusters in Washington state to an eco-village in Sweden that practices permaculture farming. Richards describes co-living specifically as a "community of unaffiliated individuals renting in a non-ownership position who seek out and utilize shared amenities designed to facilitate sociability." Who knew that would be us, in our new Oakland rental.
From its start in a farmhouse and barn, Suderbyn Permaculture Ecovillage on the Swedish Island of Gotland has grown to a small village of several new and rehabilitated structures and spaces, including a greenhouse for the winter garden and an expansive plot for the summer garden.
After seven weeks here weve grilled and spent time in the yard with our downstairs neighbors, the father and son. Our landlord harvested golden plums from a backyard tree and passed them out to all the residents. Our dog regularly meanders the yard off-leash, wandering through the open back door of the downstairs unit where hes a welcome visitor.
Everyone takes turns wheeling the trash and recycling containers to the curb on pickup day, and recently, my husband and I were on work calls when we heard our downstairs neighbor pleading with parking enforcement not to ticket our car when street sweeping was scheduled. Another neighbor knocked on the front door with my keys after Id unknowingly left them on my car roof. Where Richards writes that living together "can create solutions-oriented structures of mutual support" and "proffer solutions on the front lines of our everyday lives," this, at least in part, must be what hes talking about.
Our new three-address multifamily home facilitates a couple of concepts Richards outlines that werent present in Maryland: selective sharing, and a balance of privacy and togetherness. As a unit, my family has the separation from our neighbors it needs to bond, rest, and recharge, which, as minorities, is especially important to us given the current socio-political climate. We can engage as much or as little as we like while easily contributing to our little community.
When I walk our new neighborhood, I see a significant number of multifamily dwellings that were once single-family houses. And if I walk about three blocks to the east, theres a small "edible park," formerly the site of Merritt College (and where Bobby Seale and Huey Newton met in 1966 and formed the Black Panther Party.) The park, maintained by neighbors and Phat Beets Produce, features numerous fruit trees and a huge vegetable garden that include figs, pomegranates, artichokes, berries, tomatoes, kale, and fava beans, all free to anyone whod like to pick them. Again it brought me back to Richardss book, where he mentions that eco-village in Sweden.
Unsurprisingly, Americans are slower to embrace shared amenities and a community-minded ethos when compared to our European counterparts. Says Richards, "The Cohousing Association of America tracks nearly two hundred cohousing communities in the United States. Globally, that number is much higher, with more examples in every European country (including cohousings origin, Denmark, where an estimated seven hundred communities have formed since the early 1990s), as well as Australia, Canada, China, and New Zealand."
Like the rest of restad, Bjarke Ingels Groups 8 House is far outside of central Copenhagen. The southern half of the neighborhood occupies a borderland between new residential housing and a nature preserve, and the airport and the old city.
The numbers abroad are impressive, but the figures he cites there and in the States dont paint a complete picture, which, I understand, is by design. The communities listed by organizations like the Cohousing Association are formally arranged, making them easier to track. But that doesnt make my familys new arrangement or anyone elses who chooses to live in a similar way any less intentional when it comes to our desire to share amenities or the support systems we benefit from.
Like my family, our downstairs and backyard neighbors made a choice to be where they are. They chose not to commute from a suburb to their places of work and school, or to live in a traditional apartment building that only shares access, and perhaps laundry. In choosing to live with density and share more aspects of daily life, weve all opted to balance privacy and sociability in the same way. That commonality alone connects us, providing a starting point for growing yet stronger as a community.
"In choosing to live with density and share more aspects of daily life, weve all opted to balance privacy and sociability in the same way. That commonality connects us."
As I look around my neighborhood and more in Berkeley and San Francisco, and when I visit Southern California and drive through the East and West Sides of Los Angeles, I see multifamily properties practically everywhere. Personally, I have friends with children whove opted to share property with other friends and their children. More recently, I met two unmarried millennial couples who share a two-bedroom condo on the coast in Dana Point, California. Its easy to see that choosing to live more closely together is happening at a large scale.
When my family and I first arrived in Oakland, we drove to the Emeryville marina two miles from our new home to escape the heat on one unseasonably warm day. I stared at the bays expanse of water and San Francisco beyond. From that vantage, its towering buildings glittered in the sunlight, taking on the appearance of some sort of promised land. For so long Id convinced myself that contentment was a single-family house in the suburbs. But in that moment I thought to myself, my multifamily residence in Oakland is exactly where I want to be.
With a growing population comes a growing need for innovative, sustainable housing. Together by Design explores the architectural and social benefits of communal living and shared spaces.
Here is the original post:
The Unexpected Satisfaction of Leaving Behind the American Dream - Dwell
- Intentional Community and Capitalism - Shareable - April 10th, 2024 [April 10th, 2024]
- How alternative communities have evolved from pacifist communes to a solution to the ageing population - The Conversation - March 12th, 2024 [March 12th, 2024]
- Georgia Power Announced T. Dallas Smith named to Georgia ... - All On Georgia - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- CSRWire - Thought Leaders Gather for Critical Community ... - CSRwire.com - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- EPA centers diversity with first-ever environmental youth advisory council - Yahoo News - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Rigor, Relevance, & Reality: Education Collaboratory at Yale ... - Yale School of Medicine - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Gaza: UN experts call on international community to prevent ... - ReliefWeb - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Fathering Together Announces Acquisition of City Dads Group - PR Web - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Company to pay over $50 million in largest environmental lawsuit settlement in D.C. history: Health risks to the public - Yahoo News - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Student death is now part of the routine at Middlebury - The Middlebury Campus - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- We welcomed an abandoned dog into our family. But dog dumping ... - Kansas Reflector - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- The National Climate Assessment Goes Woke - Dallasweekly - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- A Conversation about History, Race and the Meaning of True ... - Philanthropy Roundtable - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- The color of community | WORLD - WORLD News Group - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Kindness has good benefits | News, Sports, Jobs - The Review - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Georgia Power Foundation awards grant for BIG Edge ... - Georgia Southern University Newsroom - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- "Chilling": Maryland lawmakers threaten to cut aid to immigrants ... - Salon - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Three water options come with high cost | News, Sports, Jobs - Evening Observer - November 18th, 2023 [November 18th, 2023]
- Welcome to the Team, Kintan! | Office of Immigrant Affairs - Philadelphia Water Department - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Fannie Mae Recognized for Its DEI Efforts - DSNews.com - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Fannie Mae Named 'Best Place to Work for Disability Inclusion' and ... - Fannie Mae - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Focused on progress - Weekly Challenger - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Good Ancestors and Messengers of Hope - Digital Journal - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- 'Make it intentional': 3-N-1 Trinity Services helps young ... - Longview News-Journal - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- 'Latinistas' is the World's First All-Latina Fashion Doll Line - hiplatina.com - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- CSU Releases Findings of Three-Year Research Study on NAVA'S ... - InvestorsObserver - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Press Ganey's Physician of the Year on a cardiology 'game changer ... - Becker's Hospital Review - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- City Officials Join Summer Campers and Local Artists to Kick Off ... - Philadelphia Water Department - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Merrill and Linda Hutchinson on Communication for a Summer of ... - Digital Journal - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Feathers installed as Rotary District Governor | News, Sports, Jobs - The Inter-Mountain - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Theatre at St. Luke's: All Shook Up to The Little Mermaid - Orlando Sentinel - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Culture wars rage on, forcing marketers to decide whether to ... - Marketing Dive - July 11th, 2023 [July 11th, 2023]
- Some thoughts on governance of the local variety - Resilience - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- 988 is saving lives, but more awareness and support needed - Alton Telegraph - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- The Limitations of Eco-Anxiety | Atmos - Atmos Magazine - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Welcome Back: How JAPER Becomes Real for the People in Brazil ... - Just Security - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Now Is the Time to Go All In on Heat Pumps - Rocky Mountain Institute - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Tennessee Department of Transportation (TDOT) celebrates 40th ... - Elizabethton.com - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Discrimination or bureaucracy? A Jewish community in Germany ... - The Jerusalem Post - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- AAP Rules And Guidelines For How To Keep Kids Safe From Cars - Fatherly - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Pine County Sheriff's Report and Jail Roster | Communities ... - Pine City Pioneer - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Is a Hanan Ben Ari concert the solution for Jewish divisions? - opinion - The Jerusalem Post - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- What the LGBT wedding website Supreme Court ruling means for ... - The Atlanta Journal Constitution - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Out at CHM hosts its first 2023 event - Windy City Times - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- 'The time is now': Longtime friends launch support organization for ... - The Lawrence Times - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- La Vergne Receives Municipal League Award for Excellence in Fire ... - rutherfordsource.com - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- UW System offers status update on its five-year strategic plan (day 1 ... - University of Wisconsin System - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Hawaii Native Krystal Ka'ai Tackles Equity And Anti-Asian Hate For ... - Honolulu Civil Beat - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- News & events / News - Diocese of York - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Businesses that address social or environmental problems often ... - The Conversation - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- EFOC: Is This Happening To Me Because I'm Black? Combating ... - Essence - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Stations Telling Diverse Stories With Sponsored Segments from ... - Next TV - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Ex-Prisoners Face Headwinds as Job Seekers, Even as Openings ... - The New York Times - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Bungie weighs in on the current argument raging through the ... - PC Gamer - July 6th, 2023 [July 6th, 2023]
- Myanmar: Dire humanitarian and human rights situation ... - OHCHR - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Invest in our public schools - EdNC - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- N.Y. stands up for LGBTQ equality: Having Pride 12 months a year - New York Daily News - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- NASCAR, Bubba Wallace bring 'Bubba's Block Party' to Chicago - Daytona Times - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Fifth Third's 2022 Sustainability Report Shares Progress on Priorities ... - InvestorsObserver - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Top LGBTQ+ Financial Influencers to Learn from in 2023 - Investopedia - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- 'Retirement is so traditional,' try periodic retirement to figure out ... - Morningstar - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Crisis of missing and murdered Indigenous people brings federal ... - New Mexico In Depth - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- The Astounding Power of Intentional Productivity (And How You Can ... - The Good Men Project - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- What SCOTUS ruling on affirmative action means for UL schools - Louisiana Radio Network - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Community managers find the path for developers and players to ... - VentureBeat - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- The EPA was ready to clean up 'Cancer Alley.' Then it backed off. - Grist - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- What Bidenomics Means for Workers and Families - UpNorthNews - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- The vital link between a healthy press and our republic - The Fulcrum - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Death, Drag, and Decadence shows off the queer joy of DnD - Wargamer - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Israeli Expats in the U.S.: 'I Speak English, but I Don't Speak American' - Tablet Magazine - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- NTSB hearings end with talks on tanker conditions, fire's aftermath - Marietta Times - June 30th, 2023 [June 30th, 2023]
- Can 'Friendship Clubs' Cure the Loneliness Created by Remote Work? - The San Francisco Standard - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- 'Men in Blazers' Podcast Comes to Higher Ground to Talk Vermont ... - Seven Days - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- Mindfulness, breathwork expert preaches value of slow living to Black and brown communities - Yahoo News - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- Idaho's physician shortage is here. Here's what we can do about it. - Idaho Capital Sun - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- Awards Ceremony Shines Spotlight on Caltech's Trailblazers in ... - Caltech - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- The African American Museum of Iowa Announces Juneteenth ... - River Cities Reader - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- US Supreme Court Rules Against Striking Drivers Who Abandoned ... - Engineering News-Record - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- The Future of the Thomaston Green is Green (or should be) - PenBayPilot.com - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]
- The Elephant in the Ethernet Port - City Journal - June 4th, 2023 [June 4th, 2023]