Advice: Can I ask my driver to turn off the music? – The Boston Globe

Ha! If it werent for the music I get introduced to by Lyft drivers, I would literally not listen to anything but Talking Heads and Broadway cast albums. Im always disappointed when they take note of my sensible shoes and reading glasses and turn the party off.

Theres a difference between radio that is simply not to your taste and radio that assaults the mind or senses. You can ask a driver to turn down the first and turn off the second. The golden rule of car radio is that drivers choose the soundtrackfrom a generally acceptable menu. Passengers shouldnt be exposed to excessive volume, profanity, screaming, insults, religious proselytization, or sexually explicit material. This is the case regardless of the demographics of either party. Earphones or buds are also your friend, and using a ride to catch up on voice mail, or listen to the news or a podcast, makes your request for quiet about you, not about the drivers choices.

Does this make you feel more comfortable? I must say, life gets a lot easier if you stop worrying what service providers think about you as a person. You want them to think well of you as a customerone who pays and tips well, gives relevant feedback, honors their time constraints, communicates clearly and respectfully, and so on. But its really OK if they think youre scatterbrained or awkward or have awful tasteor whatever. Silently judging the customers is part of the fun of every job. Dont take that away. Your drivers might think youre old and out of touch. So what? We live in an explosion of diversity and information. Everyones scope is necessarily limited.

Miss Conduct is Robin Abrahams, a writer with a PhD in psychology.

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Advice: Can I ask my driver to turn off the music? - The Boston Globe