Did you ever have to make up your mind?: Pick up on one and leave the other behind – The Jolt News

Alexis Rae Baker

By Alexis Rae Baker

Dear Lexis,

Im in my first year of college and I dont know what major I should work toward.

There are a lot of interesting things, but I feel that choosing one innately means Im giving up something else. How am I supposed to pick?

Thanks,

~ Undecided

Dear Undecided,

I understand your conundrum, and youre right: by choosing one path you sacrifice the option of another. Its a kind of inevitability. And while there is potential to choose a different path at some point in the future, the sacrifice of choosing a single path will probably serve you better for now.

Jordan Peterson, author of 12 Rules for Life discusses the concept of Peter Pan when it comes to this topic. He describes how Peter sees Hook, the only adult he knows, and decides not to sacrifice his childhood for fear of becoming Hook. That decision holds ramifications, though. Because hes unwilling to embrace his adulthood, he sacrifices his chance to have a relationship and family and must settle for the fantasy of Tinker Bell instead. After Skools video (shown above) is a good example of Petersons discussion around this topic.

In the end, no matter what you choose, you are sacrificing something. You sacrifice the certainty, status, and stability of a specialized job (or business) by choosing not to choose.

Choosing a path means sacrificing the freedom of following a different path, or multiple paths. Relationships are another example of this; you can choose not to settle down but you sacrifice the potential of having a family, but if you choose to settle down, you give up your right to bounce from partner to partner at your whim.

The particulars of your choice, which path you choose, are largely irrelevant in the end. Choose a path that you believe suits your skills, talents, and interests, and then accept that choice. If you choose freedom, know what youre sacrificing; but if you choose a particular path, knowing the choices youre sacrificing can aid you in choosing the best match for you. Recognize the sacrifice and the benefits that accompany said sacrifice and then make your choice.

As for the specifics, which path you should choose, your family and friends would probably be more helpful. They know who you are, what has interested you through your life, and what activities and subjects have held your attention and inspired you. They know where your talents lay, and they know your personality and whether you need more variety or more structure when it comes to your future career path.

You get to choose how your life plays out. You can change your mind in the future if you feel the need, but the knowledge that you are always sacrificing something, no matter the decision, will aid you in your decision making. This knowledge will help you think through each choice and, by doing so, help you choose which sacrifice you are willing to make and which benefits inspire you the most. Youll also go forward, knowing that you considered all the possibilities, which saves you from a lifetime of second-guessing.

Knowledge is your friend now, self-knowledge in particular. If you put in the work though, you will find your solution and youll feel sure of your course. Through this process, youll find that you never regret the decisions you make because youve made them from a place of understanding and thorough consideration. Its not easy, but its worth the effort. Lean on your friend and family, listen to your heart, and youll get your answer.

I hope this helps you, but if you have a question about this topic, or have different questions that you would like my perspective on, feel free to reach out and email me. I love your feedback too, so if you found this article helpful, Id love to hear from you too.

Best of luck,

~ Lexis

Alexis Rae Baker writes from her home in Olympia. Got a question about life, relationships, spirit? Write to Lexis atLexis@theJOLTnews.com

Editors Note: Yes, the headline borrows from John Sebastians song title and lyrics.

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Did you ever have to make up your mind?: Pick up on one and leave the other behind - The Jolt News