The simplest theory of human nature is hedonism we pursue pleasure and comfort. Suffering and pain are, by their very nature, to be avoided. The spirit of this view is nicely captured in The Epic of Gilgamesh: Let your belly be full, enjoy yourself always by day and by night! Make merry each day, dance and play day and night For such is the destiny of men. And also by the Canadian rock band Trooper: Were here for a good time / Not a long time / So have a good time / The sun cant shine every day.
Hedonists wouldnt deny that life is full of voluntary suffering we wake up in the middle of the night to feed the baby, take the 8.15 into the city, undergo painful medical procedures. But for the hedonist, these unpleasant acts are seen as the costs that must be paid to obtain greater pleasures in the future. Challenging and difficult work is the ticket to survival and status; boring exercise and unpleasant diets are what you have to go through for abs of steel and a vibrant old age, and so on.
Plainly theres something right here. Nobody could doubt we possess drives for food, sex, status and much else and that much of our suffering is chosen with these ends in mind.
But I think hedonism is an awful theory. My latest book, The Sweet Spot: Suffering, Pleasure, and the Key to a Good Life, makes the case for a different theory of what people want. I argue that we dont only seek pleasure, we also want to live meaningful lives and this involves willingly experiencing pain, anxiety, and struggle. We see value in chosen suffering.
After all, people willingly climb mountains, run marathons, or get punched in the face in gyms and dojos. Others, mostly young men, choose to go to war and, while they dont wish to be maimed or killed, they are hoping to experience challenge, fear and struggle to be baptised by fire, to use the clichd phrase. Some of us choose to have children, and usually we have some sense of how hard it will be; maybe we even know of all the research showing that, moment by moment, the years with young children can be more stressful than any other time of life, (And those who dont know this ahead of time will quickly find out.) and yet we rarely regret our choices.
Strangely enough, then, we often choose to suffer. A better story of our nature was nicely expressed in the movie The Matrix, where Agent Smith tells Morpheus how the world they are experiencing a simulation created by malevolent computers came to be: Did you know that the first Matrix was designed to be a perfect human world? Where none suffered, where everyone would be happy. It was a disaster. No one would accept the programme, entire crops were lost. Some believed that we lacked the programming language to describe your perfect world, but I believe that, as a species, human beings define their reality through misery and suffering. So the perfect world was a dream that your primitive cerebrum kept trying to wake up from.
Why would we ever choose to suffer? Sometimes, as a hedonist would tell you, its for the sake of tangible goals. Pain can distract us from our anxieties and even help us transcend the self. Choosing to suffer can serve social goals it can display how tough we are or serve as a cry for help. Unpleasant emotions, such as fear and sadness, are part of play and fantasy and can provide moral satisfaction. And effort and struggle and difficulty can, in the right contexts, lead to the joys of mastery and flow.
But theres more. The economist George Loewenstein gives the example of serious mountaineering. The pleasures here are not obvious, to say the least; rather, it seems to be unrelenting misery from end to end. Diaries and journals by climbers talk about relentless cold (often leading to frostbite and loss of extremities, or death), exhaustion, snow-blindness, altitude sickness, sleeplessness, squalid conditions, hunger, fear There is constant craving for food. And there is boredom: On a typical ascent, the vast majority of time is spent in mind-bogglingly monotonous activities for example, being weathered out for many hours in a small smelly tent crammed in with other climbers. Climbers describe their experiences as lonely and alienating, spending days and weeks in bitter silence, with disagreements that dont get smoothed over. And yet people do it, and then do it again and again, getting some satisfaction that doesnt reduce in any real way to pleasure.
Apparently, then, for at least some of us, a life well lived is more than a life of pleasure and happiness. I side with the economist Tyler Cowen, who wrote: Whats good about an individual human life cant be boiled down to any single value. Its not all about beauty or all about justice or all about happiness. Pluralist theories are more plausible, postulating a variety of relevant values, including human wellbeing, justice, fairness, beauty, the artistic peaks of human achievement, the quality of mercy, and the many different and, indeed, sometimes contrasting kinds of happiness. Life is complicated.
Alongside pleasure, there is a desire for meaningful pursuits. If this motivation is unsatisfied, life feels incomplete. This tweet, from Greta Thunberg, captures a pretty typical reaction to finding meaning in ones life: Before I started school striking I had no energy, no friends and I didnt speak to anyone. I just sat alone at home, with an eating disorder. All of that is gone now, since I have found a meaning, in a world that sometimes seems shallow and meaningless to so many people.
Viktor Frankl came to a similar conclusion. In his early years as a psychiatrist in Vienna, in the 1930s, Frankl studied depression and suicide. During that period, the Nazis rose to power, and they took over Austria in 1938. Not willing to abandon his patients or his elderly parents, Frankl chose to stay, and he was one of the millions of Jews who ended up in a concentration camp first at Auschwitz, then Dachau. Ever the scholar, Franklstudied his fellow prisoners, wondering about what distinguishes those who maintain a positive attitude from those who cannot bear it, losing all motivation and often killing themselves.
He concluded the answer is meaning. Those who had the best chance of survival were those whose lives had broader purpose, some goal or project or relationship, some reason to live. As he later wrote (paraphrasing Nietzsche): Those who have a why to live, can bear with almost any how.
As a psychiatrist, Frankl was interested in mental health. But his plea for a life of meaning a central part of the therapy he developed once he left the camps wasnt merely based on the notion that this would provide happiness or psychological resilience. He believed that this is the sort of existence we should want to pursue. He was sensitive to the distinction between happinessand what Aristotle described as eudaemonia literally good spirit, but referring to flourishing in a more general sense. It was eudaemonia that mattered to Frankl.
How do we get from meaning to suffering? There is a wealth of scientific evidence suggesting a connection. Individuals who say their lives are meaningful report more anxiety and worry and struggle than those who say that their lives are happy. The countries where citizens report the most meaning tend to be poor ones where life is relatively difficult. (In contrast, the countries with the happiest people tend to be prosperous and safe.) The jobs that people say are most meaningful, such as being a medical professional or a member of the clergy, often involve dealing with other peoples pain. And when asked to describe the most meaningful experiences of our lives, we tend to think about those on the extremes, very pleasant and very painful.
Its not that we seek out suffering. Rather, we seek out meaning and purpose. But part of meaning and purpose is difficulty anxiety, stress, conflict, boredom, and often physical and emotional pain. We choose pursuits we know will test us training for a marathon, raising children, climbing Everest because we know at a gut level that these are the pursuits that matter.
After all, wouldnt a life without some suffering ultimately be boring? Ill end with another origin story, this one from Alan Watts, the British philosopher and popular interpreter of Zen Buddhism.
Watts begins by asking you to imagine that you are able to dream about whatever you want, with perfect vividness. Given this power, you could, in a single night, have a dream that lasted 75 years. What would you do? Obviously, he says, youd fulfil all your wishes, choose every sort of pleasure. It would be a hedonistic blowout.
Then suppose you can do it again the next night, and then the next, and the next. Soon, Watts says, you would say to yourself: now lets have a surprise, a dream which isnt under control, where something is gonna happen to me but I dont know what its gonna be.
And then you would continue to gamble, adding increasing add risk, uncertainty, ignorance, deprivation. You would put obstacles in your way, obstacles you might not be able to overcome, until finally you would dream the dream of living the life you are actually living today.
Is your life right now with its difficulty and struggle, worry and loss the best that life can be? Probably not. But Wattss fantasy is close enough to the truth to be profound.
The Sweet Spot: Suffering, Pleasure and the Key to a Good Life by Paul Bloom is published by Bodley Head at 20. Buy it for 17.40 at guardianbookshop.com
Continue reading here:
- 10 best Reverse 1999 Arcanists to use and build - Sportskeeda - November 20th, 2023 [November 20th, 2023]
- The tightrope of 'Cabaret' - The Source - Washington University in St ... - Washington University in St. Louis - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Peter Schlesinger's Hedonistic Photos of Artists in 1970s Paris - AnOther Magazine - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Jonathan Baileys Long-Awaited New Drama Is Almost Upon Us Here's The Lowdown On Fellow Travelers - Yahoo Sport Australia - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Surusinghe 'Brake Fluid' EP review: every second hits as hard as a ... - NME - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Reformation Taps Model and Actress Camille Rowe for Holiday ... - Sourcing Journal - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Latest additions to the Halloween horror movie canon - Two Row Times - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Towa Bird Shares New Single And Video 'Drain Me!' - uDiscover Music - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- We Asked AI to Rewrite the Eagles Hit "Hotel California" about ... - American Songwriter - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- There's no such thing as normal mental health - The Medium - The Medium - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Use your voice, Luke: How Mark Hamill's anti-Jedi mind tricks gave ... - Salon - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Realms Of Ruin Finally Fixes A Major Problem With Warhammer ... - TheGamer - October 25th, 2023 [October 25th, 2023]
- Eric Nam and SG Lewis on Feeling Lonely and Getting Healthy - Interview - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Tom Ford Waxes Nostalgic and Prada Plays the Slime Card - The New York Times - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- September Horoscopes - The New Paltz Oracle - SUNY The New Paltz Oracle - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Attracting Gen Z Workers and Future Leaders to Automotive - Ward's Auto - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- C Pam Zhang on Relishing Pleasure, Observing Billionaires, and ... - Vanity Fair - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Paramount+: new shows and films streaming in October 2023 - ScreenHub - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- At 2nd Debate, Rivals Laud Reagan, Trump Dances on His Grave - TIME - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Business is Key to Attaining Justice and Peace in the World - denvercatholic.org - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- San Antonio filmmaker recalls time he recorded Jimmy Buffett ... - San Antonio Current - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- The Will and Intensity of Marisol - frieze.com - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- All Is (Boomer) Vanity - The American Conservative - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Slayyyter: STARFUCKER review - takes you on one hell of a night ... - The Line of Best Fit - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- 10 Best Modern Movies Set in the 1990s - MovieWeb - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Condiments & sauces category propelled by natural colors and ... - Food Ingredients First - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Dumb Money director reveals fundamental difference with Wolf of ... - Dexerto - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- How Janet Jackson, Lost in Translation, and Melbourne nights inspired Troye Sivan's new album - Yahoo Eurosport UK - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Outside the Box: Is Russell Brand a Victim of Groupie Culture? - Fair Observer - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Russia Lauds North Korea's 'Square-Headed Dude' and His Pauper ... - Center for European Policy Analysis - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Where to Watch and Stream 'Saw X': Showtimes - Collider - September 28th, 2023 [September 28th, 2023]
- Why I believe the question God, what is your will for my life? belies ... - Patheos - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Pleasure in the age of panic - Cherwell Online - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Dominique Larose: Northern Ballet's first soloist on bringing The ... - Luxury London - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Drew Barrymore reveals Kate Bosworth sent her flowers after ex Justin Long visited her show - Yahoo Entertainment - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Chris Holmes: I'm overlooked, sure. When I was in W.A.S.P., I was ... - Guitar World - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Sophie Ellis-Bextor on if she'd ever do Eurovision and her ... - NME - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- 10 Movies like The Social Network you must watch - Ready Steady Cut - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- The eternal paradox, and 'Quantum Criminals,' of Steely Dan - Wisconsin Public Radio - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- Five Classic SF Novels Featuring Advanced Body Modifications - tor.com - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- From queer Westerns to Wes Anderson Here are HUNGER's most ... - Hunger TV - May 18th, 2023 [May 18th, 2023]
- WGSN, Coloro Crown Moody Navy Alternative as 2025 Color of the Year - Yahoo Life - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- Woo Girl Nails Life Balance For First Time Ever With Piss Up Friday ... - The Betoota Advocate - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- Biden's Corruption Is What The Media Hoped For Trump - The Federalist - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- Brandon Cronenberg Dives into the Deep End - FilmInk - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- The 10 Best Movies of 1996, Ranked - Collider - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- WFA: The Shits - Everything Is Noise - May 10th, 2023 [May 10th, 2023]
- 10 Things You Must Do On Your First Hedo Trip - Vacation Parties - January 23rd, 2023 [January 23rd, 2023]
- Epicurus | Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy - January 23rd, 2023 [January 23rd, 2023]
- An All-Nude Vacation With My Boyfriend Taught Me a Ton ... - SELF - January 19th, 2023 [January 19th, 2023]
- What to Expect at Hedonism | Hedonism II - December 21st, 2022 [December 21st, 2022]
- HEDONISM II: HOTWIFING HEAVEN - Hedonism II - November 25th, 2022 [November 25th, 2022]
- Disco - Wikipedia - November 25th, 2022 [November 25th, 2022]
- Hedonism Resorts - Wikipedia - October 30th, 2022 [October 30th, 2022]
- What Is Hedonism? An Ethics Explainer by The Ethics Centre - October 21st, 2022 [October 21st, 2022]
- Eudaimonia - Wikipedia - October 21st, 2022 [October 21st, 2022]
- 'The White Lotus' season 2 trailer brims with love, murder and a whole lot of hedonism - Alternative Press - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Reconsidering the Good Life - Boston Review - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Alcoholic Drinks and the Spectre of Stagflation; A Wile E. - Euromonitor International - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- The Weeknd Brings Sex, Money, and Drugs to His New Series: The Idol - uDiscover Music - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- 7 of the Best Rock Bands of the '70s - American Songwriter - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Yeah Yeah Yeahs, TV On The Radio, And More Featured In Meet Me In The Bathroom Trailer - uDiscover Music - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Is the new Porsche 911 GT3 RS the most extreme road car in history? - British GQ - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Charlies Good Tonight: Read an Exclusive Excerpt From the Authorized Biography of the Rolling Stones Late Drummer - Billboard - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Wreck cast on huge behind-the-scenes secret on BBC series: Can you imagine the chaos? - Express - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Four albums recorded in France and one song that should have been - The Connexion - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Twisted elegance: Janet Jacksons The Velvet Rope is a template for Black pop stars to embrace the darkness - TheGrio - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- On the futility of modern bureaucratic states - Catholic Culture - October 8th, 2022 [October 8th, 2022]
- Fall is the time towards the cranberry secure - DU Express - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- 1st October Weekend in Osijek Was Full of Life - Trust Us, Head On East - Total Croatia News - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- LSD, Dolly's and a Rolls Royce car chase: How Bob Dylan and The Rolling Stones nearly came to blows - Far Out Magazine - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- I survived the sex, drugs, and misogyny of 90s Wall Street to make millions - New York Post - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- The Stars Advise: Dont Overdo It in Indulgence - astrosofa.com - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Procera rolls out vintage gins - The Spirits Business - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- How To Watch 'Hellraiser' In The UK: Horror Film Reboot Set To Terrify Audiences - Bustle - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Fresh blood brings new life to Interview with the Vampire - The Boston Globe - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Why do bankers love techno? - The Spectator - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Alice In Chains : Dirt - The heaviest grunge album at 30 | Treble - Treble - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- The simmering wickedness of Pentiment's dialogue is a delight - Eurogamer.net - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- Gothic Gin Announced as Official Partner of Goodwood Revival - BevNET.com - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]