On hearing this week that a purple-haired Extinction Rebellion activist (keen on vintage clothes and fantastic sex) had suggested that Baby Boomers should be euthanised as revenge for their contributions to climate change, I expected the culprit to be the usual fresh-faced millennial who weve all become bored of being scolded by. But on seeing photographs of 59-year-old (only three years younger than me) Jessica Townsend, it all made even more recognisably ludicrous sense, despite her comment supposedly being a joke. (Would she have made it about any other group? No. Therefore it wasnt a joke.) For she is one of the growing tribe of left-wing old people who identify as Forever Young.
Its an easy mistake to make. It was always going to be hard for anyone who grew up in the Sixties or later to age gracefully; I was born in 1959 and I dont think Ill ever get around to it. But then, I dont joke about exterminating people according to how old they are.
Before the Sixties, youth was something people wanted to get over as soon as possible so they could join the adult world with all its arcane pleasures. But the moment the pill led sex before marriage to become normalised, adulthood lost a great deal of its appeal. Philip Larkin wrote Annus Mirabilis about this development (Sexual intercourse began / In nineteen sixty-three / Between the end of the Chatterley ban / And the Beatles first LP / Up to then thered only been / A sort of bargaining / A wrangle for the ring / A shame that started at sixteen / And spread to everything) and returned to it in High Windows (When I see a couple of kids / And guess hes fucking her and shes / Taking pills or wearing a diaphragm / I know this is paradise / Everyone old has dreamed of all their lives). The young seemed to be having the best sex so of course adults wanted to dress like them and eventually act like them, too.
Then the Boomers didnt do the decent thing and die, due to the wonder of modern medicine; instead, theyre reporting at A&E with unparalleled recreational drug use and at sexual-health clinics with a little something they picked up on their last 58-70 holiday. Stairlift to heaven indeed! These are the SKIs (Spending Kids Inheritance), or what I call the YOLOAPs. Wrap up warm and Ill meet you at the cyber caf!, I heard a lovely lady in her seventies shouting gleefully into her iPhone on the bus.
On paper, Townsend should be one of these happy old dears getting high on the modern world; she enjoys lemon drizzle cake, hot buttered toast, mushroom risotto and burgundy wine. Its a lovely life being a writer, and she has apparently had a career as a playwright and screenwriter, though disillusion with her craft appears to have been fermenting all the while: When I was first a writer in my twenties there seemed at that time to be no big subjects to write about, and I felt slightly badly placed to be born into cosy times most of the plays, films and novels I read were about white, middle-class, heterosexual couples betraying each other. It was while researching a novel set in 2030 that she became interested in climate change before becoming an Extinction Rebellion activist, co-founding the XR podcast and the Writers Rebel group.
Her words speak volumes even if her volumes dont. Those who latch on to the climate-change panic are, in my experience, not terribly gifted people who nevertheless crave the spotlight; hence the spectacular but silly protest events of XR, which are high on media opportunities but low on persuading the public. Meanwhile, those who have been successful in their chosen careers often feel a bit establishment, and see cosying up to climate crusaders as a way to give them back a bit of their edge see Emma Thompson taking a flight of over 5,400 miles between Los Angeles and London, thus stomping out a one-and-a-half-tonne carbon footprint, in order to show solidarity with Extinction Rebellion. XR activists, though they demand that flights be used only in emergencies, then simpered that Dame Emmas jaunt was an unfortunate cost in our bigger battle to save the planet.
Faced with an uninspiring writing career, as Ms Townsend appears to have been, what could be more of a kickstart to the electric scooter of creativity than a leading role in the latest struggle between good and evil? She claims that those who oppose her chosen tribe will go down in history in the same way as those who opposed the abolition of slavery, the enfranchisement of the working classes, the Suffragettes. In short, she is one of the Righteous Old, not to be confused with those bumptious Boomers living it up at their local cyber caf.
Members of the climate-change crew have previous in identifying as things theyre not, it must be said. Though their meetings make your average UKIP rally look like Reggae Sunsplash, they identify as diverse and inclusive, so thats okay. They identify as non-polluters though some of their leading lights appear to have clocked up the frequent-flyer points faster than anyone since pre-shamed Prince Andrew, hopping on planes quicker than you can say Instagram. One of them was shown on social media enjoying safari holidays in Uganda, boozing on the beach in New Zealand and bungee jumping over the Nile. Thats not a simple carbon footprint thats a carbon clown-shoe footprint.
Of course its not just climate change that attracts the Peter Pan Tendency to politics; Ive written here before about the Grumpy Old Woke Bros who have taken it upon themselves to instruct uppity women and members of the working class on how to behave. Way back at an anti-Brexit rally in 2017, the then 68-years-young Ian McEwan spluttered: A gang of angry old men are shaping the future of the country against the inclinations of its youth. By 2019, the country could be in a receptive mood: 2.5million over-18-year-olds, freshly franchised and mostly Remainers; 1.5million oldsters, mostly Brexiters, freshly in their graves.
Kate Bush has written some lovely songs, but I really believe that The Man With the Child in His Eyes gave a bunch of foolish males the stupid idea that if they never grew up, it would be really attractive. Newsflash: its not. When men used to be accused of having the male menopause, we mocked them as sad old salary men, keen to get hold of the fast car and the foxy girlfriend after a lifetime of wage slavery but lefties, bohos and artists are just as bad.
Both Johnny Depp and Amber Heard strike me as appalling people, but I did feel sorry for her when a witness claimed she told me she didnt like hanging around at his house with his friends because it was boring and it was all old men playing guitars and it wasnt interesting her. A young friend of mine was taken with a famous writer twice her age some years back until it transpired that his idea of fun was hanging out with other middle-aged famous writers swapping the most obscure Bob Dylan lyrics back and forth.
In unattractive rous from Hefner to Westwood, there is the conviction that attractive young women are genuinely keen on having sex with them; they obviously possess magic mirrors. Yes, the occasional woman suffers from this delusion too see Madonna wiggling away on TikTok in a thong but men are far more prone to this most debilitating of diseases. And I can see why theyre confused. If you can get applause for identifying as the opposite sex, when every cell in your body says otherwise, why on Earth shouldnt you be considered stunning and brave for identifying as Forever Young?
Julie Burchill is a spiked columnist. Her book, Welcome To The Woke Trials: How #Identity Killed Progressive Politics, is published Academica Press.
Go here to see the original:
Old lefties need to grow up - Spiked
- Why are Jamaicans forced to live in poverty? - Jamaica Gleaner - October 29th, 2023 [October 29th, 2023]
- The ultimate price - The Midwest Center for Investigative Reporting - October 29th, 2023 [October 29th, 2023]
- Cornyn, Cruz lead another GOP delegation on border tour of RGV - Brownsville Herald - October 29th, 2023 [October 29th, 2023]
- Landworkers' Alliance Report: Debt, Migration, and Exploitation - Joint Council for the Welfare of Immigrants - October 29th, 2023 [October 29th, 2023]
- Searching for wholeness in a nation fractured by capitalism and ... - Kansas Reflector - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- Explainer: The State of Poverty and Slavery in Ecuador - JURIST - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- That AI You're Using Was Trained By Slave Labor, Basically - Futurism - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- Bibb Announces Ten Winners of $5000 Restaurant Grants to ... - Cleveland Scene - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- Sugarcane Burning Is a Plague on These Black Floridians Mother ... - Mother Jones - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- 18 of the Most Haunted Places in Alabama - AZ Animals - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- Immigration Health Surcharge: equality impact assessment 2023 ... - GOV.UK - October 23rd, 2023 [October 23rd, 2023]
- Books The common cause - Morning Star Online - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- Search warrants executed in alleged human trafficking and slavery ... - ACT Policing News - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- Modern slavery and human trafficking: identifying and reporting ... - GOV.UK - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- Report: Government needs better policies to help narrow economic equity gap - Yahoo News - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- New Zealand criminal investigation into systemic migrant worker ... - WSWS - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- What back to school means in the era of PragerU - Reckon - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- The Jacksonville Shooting and the Far Right - Left Voice - September 3rd, 2023 [September 3rd, 2023]
- Build support for today's union struggles The Militant - The Militant - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- Work requirements wont affect the debt ceiling but they will stir up ... - The Boston Globe - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- Ten Percent of North Koreans Forced To Work as Slaves: New Report - The New York Sun - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- Anti-Slavery Commissioner visits the Coffs Coast - News Of The Area - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- Former Server Says Customers Should Tip If They Ask Questions - The Daily Dot - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- New exhibition looks at the UK's role in indenture labour - ianVisits - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- UNITED WE STAND: THE FIERCE URGENCY OF NOW - Savannah Tribune - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- No, MLK Was Not a Christian Nationalist - Word and Way - June 2nd, 2023 [June 2nd, 2023]
- Fact check: Tipping began amid slavery, then helped keep former Black ... - December 28th, 2022 [December 28th, 2022]
- Slavery - Wikipedia - December 28th, 2022 [December 28th, 2022]
- Social class - Wikipedia - December 23rd, 2022 [December 23rd, 2022]
- Author Ibram X. Kendi speaks in Portland on legacy of slavery and the tipped wage - Press Herald - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- As a Nation, We are Doomed to Fail if the 'Original Sin' of the Past is not Reconciled in the Present - CT Examiner - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Lincolnshire car wash owners handed 10-year slavery order - Lincolnshire Live - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- "Under The Banner of King Death" puts pirates in their place in the history of workers' rights - Boing Boing - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Forrest Hylton | To the Lighthouse LRB 18 October 2022 - London Review of Books - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Aussie Brands Among Most Improved in 2022's Ethical Fashion Report But There's Still a Long Way To Go - Broadsheet - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- DC voter guide: 2022 election what you need to know - WTOP - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Exploring the Fault Lines in Mental Health Discourse: An Interview with Psychologist Justin Karter - Mad in America - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Iran: 'Society has risen to overthrow the Islamic Republic' - Green Left - October 19th, 2022 [October 19th, 2022]
- Slavery by any name is wrong: the push to end forced labor in prisons - The Guardian US - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Abortion, Marijuana, Slavery: 11 Themes to 2022 Ballot Measures - The Epoch Times - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Visions of Progress tells tales of two Charlottesvilles, Black and white - Bristol Herald Courier - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Miss Malini's job advert puts spotlight back on 'exploitative bosses' and a 'pittance' as salary - Moneycontrol - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- As Hurricane Ian Threatens Florida's Southwest Coast, What's Happening On The Ground - KPCC - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Truths about student debt, college costs, and corporate freeloading on the backs of students. - Daily Kos - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- The Kohinoor, Cullinan and the enduring demand for reparations across the colonial world - The Indian Express - October 2nd, 2022 [October 2nd, 2022]
- Divine Politik: The rise of robots should be the downfall of capitalism The Daily Free Press - Daily Free Press - September 14th, 2022 [September 14th, 2022]
- Stop romanticizing the lives of 1950s housewives - Halifax Examiner - September 14th, 2022 [September 14th, 2022]
- Domestic workers, long excluded from labor protections, call for codified rights - The 19th* - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- Pierre Poilievre Claims He's a Friend of the 'Working Class'. He's Spent Years Attacking Canadian Workers. - PressProgress - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- Stockard on the Stump: Governor declares he didn't violate the Little Hatch Act Tennessee Lookout - Tennessee Lookout - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- How Central American immigrants played a vital role in the U.S. labor - Fast Company - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- The unity imperative: Lessons for building the anti-fascist alliance - People's World - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- How FrontLine Farming Is Using Land to Grow Food and Heal Generational Trauma - 5280 | The Denver Magazine - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- Queen Elizabeth II Reigned For 70 Years: Here Are The 10 Longest-Reigning Kings And Queens Of The UK - Forbes - September 11th, 2022 [September 11th, 2022]
- Ballot initiatives to watch in 2022 midterms, from abortion to slavery - USA TODAY - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- 10 Songs That Deal with Labor Rights and Hating Your Job - MetalSucks - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- Conflict and modern slavery: the investment perspective - Schroders - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- The Santa Cruz County boom town that went BOOM - The Mercury News - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- This Labor Day, buy produce grown only on farms that respect workers rights - The Hill - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- The unity imperative: Lessons for building the anti-fascist alliance - Communist Party USA - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- Agency visits US to share efforts to end fisher abuse - - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- High income tax in PNG is a disincentive - POST-COURIER - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- For women of color in care work, racial and economic inequities abound, report shows - The Boston Globe - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- Opinion | Behind the Rise in Union SupportAnd the Challenge Ahead - Common Dreams - September 7th, 2022 [September 7th, 2022]
- Slavery and Trafficking Risk Order imposed on Lincolnshire car wash owners - Forecourt Trader - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Opinion | The Tide Is Turning: US Congress Finally Considers a National Domestic Workers Bill of Rights - Common Dreams - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Edited Transcript of ADH.AX earnings conference call or presentation 22-Aug-22 1:30am GMT - Yahoo Finance - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Conservatives Explain Why They Are Preparing For A Civil War - The Onion - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- 10 Black Millionaires Who Got Busted By The IRS For Failure To Pay Taxes - Moguldom - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- 34 Great Records You May Have Missed: Spring/Summer 2022 - Pitchfork - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Amazon Hit by Strikes Across the Globe - Novara Media - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- The Past, Present, and Future of Work - YES! Magazine - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- National Trust members: get ready to choke on your carrot cake - The Guardian - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Lost Yet Connected in Time: Brown, Peltier, Melaku-Bello, Abu-Jamal, and Assange - LA Progressive - August 23rd, 2022 [August 23rd, 2022]
- Mondelz commits to living wage for cocoa farmers and invests in education programmes for children - ConfectioneryNews.com - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]
- Opinion | The Supreme Court Has Too Much Power and Liberals Are to Blame - POLITICO - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]
- Breaking the stranglehold of speculative property ownership | interest.co.nz - Interest.co.nz - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]
- Why fashion should act now to legislate living wages in the supply chain - Drapers - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]
- Georgia's six-week abortion ban goes Into effect, an attack on... - Liberation - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]
- 10 years on, what is the true legacy of the London 2012 Olympics? - Metro.co.uk - July 27th, 2022 [July 27th, 2022]