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Category Archives: Childfree

Permanent Birth Control Is in Demand in the U.S.But Hard to Get – Yahoo Life

Posted: July 11, 2022 at 3:54 am

The fall of Roe v. Wade stands to dramatically shake up contraception trends. In the days following the U.S. Supreme Courts Dobbs ruling, clinics began to report a surge in people requesting tubal ligationsmore commonly known as getting ones tubes tied. This is a procedure in which the fallopian tubes are surgically blocked or sealed to prevent future pregnancies, one that is very difficult to reverse.

But those requesting the procedure often encounter a big barrier: doctors. Despite the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) advising that respect for an individual womans reproductive autonomy should be the primary concern guiding sterilization provision, people who can get pregnant are often refused the procedure. By and large, the decision still lies very much in the hands of the physician.

A doctor will typically refuse to perform a sterilization procedure on the grounds that the person is too young, that they dont have enough children, or that they might come to regret the decisionor a combination of these factors. Without a partner or any children, a persons chances of obtaining the procedure drop even lower. (There is no existing ethical guidance from the male counterpart to ACOGthe American Urological Associationon the provision of vasectomy services.)

The attitudes of todays doctors are grounded in a history of pronatalism thats existed for decades in the United States. In the 1970s the criteria for allowing sterilization were even stricter: A woman would be denied access to the procedure unless their age multiplied by the number of children they had equaled 120 or greaterif you were 40 years old with three children, you would be approved for the procedure, for example. In essence, a womans reproductive autonomy was decided on the basis of a mathematical calculation. Even today, doctors often require the sign-off of the patients partner.

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Lisa Harris, an ob-gyn and professor at the University of Michigan, has seen an influx of young women requesting tubal ligations at her institution since the fall of Roe. Many of the patients have come to her after having been refused by other doctors. Its a different manifestation of society not trusting women to know what they need, Harris says, and probably related to the same distrust that leads to things like abortion bans.

For Kayla, who lives in Chicago, a traumatic experience when she gave birth prematurely to her daughter last year meant she is sure she never wants to have another child. I cant see myself going through that again, she told her doctor. When her physician suggested birth control, Kayla pleaded for something more permanent. And she told me, No, Im too youngMaybe my daughter will want siblings. Since then, Kayla has visited at least three doctors requesting a tubal ligation, and all have refused, for similar reasons.

The concept of the risk of regret is a significant barrier to access and is based on the subjective opinion that people who can become pregnant will always want to bear children. In reality, this isnt true. The largest study to look at rates of reported regret in sterilized womenthe Collaborative Review of Sterilizationfollowed 11,000 sterilized women for 14 years after having the procedure. It found that child-free women who had been sterilized reported the lowest rates of regret among all groups of patients. And yet this myth that women, especially women without children, will come to regret their decision to be sterilized persists, says Elizabeth Hintz, an assistant professor of health communication at the University of Connecticut.

All of these reasons for denying sterilization are in direct contradiction of ACOGs ethical guidance. Yet doctors face no repercussions for refusing to perform procedures; the U.S. does not track data on how many sterilization requests are denied. So theres no accountabilitytheres no capacity to enforce a consequence, Hintz says.

Access to the procedure isnt equitable across society. Echoes of sterilizations checkered pastin which marginalized groups of women were forced to undergo the procedure, including women of color, women who were poor, and those living with disabilities or mental illnessesstill linger today. Black, Latina, and Indigenous women in the U.S. are up to twice as likely as white women to be approved for sterilization, while women with public or no health insurance are about 40% more likely to have the procedure than privately insured women.

The bottom line is that the way that this is legislated aroundand the way that these very subjective sorts of assessments are able to be madeis just a means of perpetuating this very white, wealthy, able-bodied, and cisgender idea of who ought to have children, says Hintz.

One corner of the internet in which those seeking the procedure can find advice and tips is the r/childfree community on Reddit. The subreddit has folders with extensive information on how to request the procedure, a collated list of doctors who will perform it, and a sterilization binder that members can take to their doctor with a template consent form and a form to list their reasons for wanting the procedure.

Alongside rising requests for permanent forms of birth control, the overturning of Roe has already triggered an uptick in the number of people seeking longer-lasting but nonpermanent birth control, such as intrauterine devices (IUDs). But the idea itself that birth controlpermanent or otherwisecould replace access to abortion is inherently flawed, says Krystale Littlejohn, an assistant professor of sociology at the University of Oregon whose work explores race, gender, and reproduction. Despite the fact that the majority of people who can get pregnant use some form of birth control, one in four women will have an abortion in their lifetime. This is why the just get your tubes tied or just get an IUD rhetoric that has emerged in the wake of Dobbs isnt helpful, she says.

For one, choosing these forms of birth control is not a trivial medical decision: Heavier, more painful periods and a potentially painful implantation procedureoften with no pain reliefare among the possible consequences of getting an IUD. Tubal ligations require an invasive surgical procedure and, as with any surgical procedure, can lead to complications.

In fact, the advice to use birth control can be seen as just another form of policing peoples bodies, Littlejohn says. When it comes to people suggesting that their friends or their loved ones get on long-acting birth control, I think that people believe that theyre helping other people, but what theyre really doing is encroaching on their human right to bodily autonomy, she says. Roes fall wont just mean that people with a uterus are forced to give birth, she says; its also about compelling them to use longer-acting or permanent forms of birth control.

A person living in a restrictive part of the U.S. may now feel compelled to seek out longer-term contraception or get their tubes tiedwhich is tantamount to compulsory birth control. Thats not the solution right now, she says. I think its really important that we dont try and fight reproductive injustice with reproductive coercion.

This article first appeared on Wired.

Originally Appeared on Glamour

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12 People Reveal The Things That Costs More For Women Than Men – ScoopWhoop

Posted: July 4, 2022 at 11:32 pm

From everyday items and personal-care services to even basic clothing, there are several things thatcostwomen more money than men. And, on athread, people discuss and reveal the things that cost higher to women than men. Shall we see what people had to say? Read on.Source: Pexels

1. "Everything. There are times when things actually cost more money but other times it costs us our dignity, safety, health and welfare. We pay more all the time."

-laboogie72

2. "Period products and birth control."

-Vyrnoa

3. "Razors."

- aussiesis

4. "Hairdressers."

-Niamh1971

5. "Sterilization. It's more expensive, more invasive and has higher risks for women. In fact, a lot of younger childfree women get turned down by doctors who invalidate their personal decision regarding their own bodies with comments like "you're too young to know", "what if your hypothetical future husband wants kids", "but being a mother is the best thing a woman can be/ultimate thing she should want" and similar remarks."

-MissInfer

6. "BASIC underwear. While men might be comfortable in dollar store underwear, many women need 100% cotton or a special cut just to avoid infections."

-thelaughingpear

7. "Clothing in general. For example, it's almost impossible to find clothing with pockets large enough to avoid having to carry a purse. Having to buy purses is like a tax for women. Also, having to wear multiple layers to keep guys from staring at our chests. And if you don't wash them, dry cleaners will charge more for women's dress shirts than men's shirts, caught this under a misc category. They corrected it when I pointed it out. Also, for haircuts, I've had other women complain that they pay more for a haircut than a man, even though their hair is just as short and easy to cut/style."

-UsualAnybody1807

8. "Dating and sex! Theres so much more for us to lose/risk that will always cost us more both figuratively and literally in the end."

-RideExternal5752

9. "Swimwear."

-blushingpervert

10. "Anything regarding reproductive health - tampons, pads, birth control and having a baby."

-mountain_dog_mom

11. "Having sex. Our lives are pretty costly and are now at risk every time we have sex."

-Mcstoni

12. "Existence."

-QuickLimeGirl86

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12 People Reveal The Things That Costs More For Women Than Men - ScoopWhoop

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Am I The Jerk For Bringing My Baby To A Child-Free Wedding?

Posted: July 3, 2022 at 3:55 am

Whether or not to bring kidsand especially babiesto weddings can be a very sensitive issue. Strong arguments could be made for either case. However, when the happy couple explicitly ask their guests not to bring their kids, its usually best to honor their wishes. It is their wedding day after all. And theyre giving everyone plenty of notice to find a babysitter. Heck, some of the other guests might have hired certified professionals for their own kids!

Redditor u/babyweddingthrowaway shared what happens when guests dont think that the rules apply to them. She turned to the AITA community for their opinion on whether or not she was a jerk for bringing her 10-month-old baby to her cousins wedding, despite everyone having been asked not to do this.

Scroll down for the full story in the new moms own words and to read how other internet users reacted to the entire drama. Oh, and when youre done, wed like to hear from you, Pandas. Who did you think was in the wrong? How would you have handled the situation? Do you have any weddings coming up soon? Tell us all about it in the comments.

Image credits: Justin Luck (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Samantha Gades (not the actual photo)

Image credits: babyweddingthrowaway

Its pretty darn unusual for the AITA community to be so united in their YTA verdicts. In this particular case, a huge number of redditors thought that the mom was clearly in the wrong because she did the one thing parents were asked not to do. She brought her kid. The baby disrupted the ceremony. And the thing that the couple dreaded would happen actually happened.

The redditors defense was that shed RSVPd and told her cousin that shed be bringing her baby anyway. The groom and his bride didnt tell her no again because they didnt want to start any drama. Meanwhile, some of the other guests were upset because they thought the redditor was given special treatment.

In short, this entire situation shows what happens when even a single person thinks theyre above the general guidelines. We absolutely adore kids at weddings and we totally get parents wanting to love and protect their munchkins, but at the end of the day, if its a childfree wedding, its a childfree wedding. And demanding exemptions when others are in the exact same boat as you sounds a bit selfish.

Previously, Anna and Sarah, team leaders at The Wedding Society, stressed to Bored Panda that it is vital to respect the wishes of the marrying couple.

Whether it be that kids of a certain age are welcome, only specific children of a few family and friends, or no kids at all, guests should honor the couples wishes regarding kids at the ceremony.

Please dont take the inclusion or exclusion of your little ones personally (especially if the couple dont have kids of their own to fully understand your situation) and rememberas nice as it is to bring your babes along to the celebration, its also an awesome opportunity for a fun night off if youre asked to leave them with a sitter! Anna and Sarah said that parents should strive to look at some of the positive aspects of going to a childfree wedding. Its an opportunity to spend time with your partner, friends, and family. Its a date night in disguise.

For marrying couples, the etiquette can be trickier. Newborns really need to be with their parents so please dont ask for any babies under a few months to be left at home. Its perfectly reasonable to ask for parents of older children to take the night off and leave them with a sitter, but the fairest way to do this is to make a blanket rule for everyone rather than picking and choosing which kids can come and who cant.

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Am I The Jerk For Bringing My Baby To A Child-Free Wedding?

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Responding to the Roe Rollback – Wealth Management

Posted: June 30, 2022 at 9:20 pm

The financial services field has traditionally stayed away from taking public positions on politically fraught issues that could impact bottom lines and alienate prospective clients, but the Supreme Courts recent Dobbs v. Jackson Womens Health Organization decision relegating womens reproductive health care options to the states has heightened pressure on all American businesses to do just that.

The national wirehouses, with one exception,reacted swiftly to address public (and bipartisan) outrage, and made announcements of changes in corporate policies to cover employees who may be impacted by the decision.

But beyond a handful of outspoken advisors, independent b/ds and RIAs have remained largely silent.

Ross Gerber, the CEO of Gerber Kawasaki, a registered investment advisor in Southern California, said even before the Supreme Court decision, he received threats and personal attacks for expressing his belief in a womans right to make her own health care decisions. Even so, he said he gains more clients than he loses by advocating for the right.

There's a large portion of people in America that are perfectly fine with anything if they make money doing it, said Gerber. And in the advisor world, that is a majority of advisors. Theyre not going to do things that hurt their money or their assets but worrying about one of the women in their firm, and their right and access to abortion, is probably very far down on the list of things they're worried about compared to how they can cut costs or whatever.

Appalled and terrified, Catherine Arnet-Valega, whoruns LPL broker/dealer GreenBee Advisory in Boston, Mass., said she fears men are unaware of the negative impact the ruling will have on them and that she will encourage her daughters to consider the location and stance of potential employers as they embark upon their respective careers.

Liv Gagnon, co-founder of the diversity-in-finance organization Choir, said the financial industry no longer has the luxury of avoiding political issues related to the rights and health of their employees and clients.

Companies no longer have the option to remain apolitical, Gagnon said in an email to WealthManagement.com.In fact, if a companys leadership is truly under the impression that theyareapolitical, I expect their race and/or gender provide them the privilege to turn off current events to maintain business as usual. And further, they are prioritizing their personal fragility and fear of saying the wrong thing over the rights and healthcare of their employees.

Theres an old PR adage No comment is a comment, and I believe that sums up what leaders are facing right now, she said. As stakeholders, employees, clients and industry peers, we are looking for company leadership to stand up for their people. Perhaps they dont know exactly what to say or do, but not acknowledgingin any waythe human rights crisis we are in right now is not only tone deaf, it speaks volumes about where their alliances are.

Jay Zigmont, PhD, CFP and founder of Mississippi-based RIA Childfree Wealth, questioned whether advisor documentation might be subpoenaed for use against couples who choose to get an abortion, and whether widespread plans to pay for travel to access the service would remain legally viable. He also raised concerns about other communities at risk of losing civil rights, such as same-sex couples and transgender individuals.

A few independent firms have condemned the Dobbs decision and offered support to impacted employees. Virtually none have publicly supported the ruling.

We unapologetically support every womans right to control her own body, said Mary Beth Storjohann and Neela Hummel, co-CEOs at Southern California-based RIA Abacus Wealth Partners.

Storjohann and Hummel authored a post called Reproductive Rights are Human Rights on the firms website, calling out the lack of gender and racial diversity within the financial services industry, arguing that the Supreme Court ruling will exacerbate income inequality and challenging other industry professionals to speak up and ensure that all employees have equitable health care and advancement opportunities.

Abacus is currently working with its HR and legal departments to offer financial support for any employee, spouse or dependent who needs to travel for any health care servicesincluding reproductive and gender-affirming servicescovered by insurance but not available in their state.

Unfortunately, the pair noted, what was a constitutional right last week is now a private health decision that must be shared with employers. The privacy of our employees and their families is our top concern, so we are also creating an internal policy that allows for as much privacy as possible while accessing this benefit.

Adasina Social Capital, a San Francisco-based social justice investing firm, has issued two statements on the subjectthe first in response to the Texas abortion ban passed last fall and another when the Dobbs decision was first leaked in May.

Access to reproductive healthcare, including safe and legal abortion, is an issue of gender justice, economic justice and racial justice, Adasina stated. And the right to bodily autonomy is one of basic human dignity. The firm noted that reproductive rights remain a criterion for its Adasina Social Justice index, which supports investment in companies aligned with racial, gender, economic and climate justice initiatives.

Keith Beverly, CIO and managing partner of the Washington D.C.-based RIA Grid 202, released a statement on LinkedIn on Tuesday, expressing support for organizations such as Planned Parenthood and Power to Decide, as well as for efforts to elect more women to public office.

While the Dobbs decision is a significant blow to those of us who believe all women should have dominion over their own bodies, it said, it also underscores the necessity to organize and mobilize for the causes we hold dear.

With the exception of UBS, which has its headquarters in Switzerland, all major U.S. wirehouses publicly outlined changes to their health care plans to reimburse travel-related expenses in cases where a covered individual is unable to receive comprehensive reproductive care in their home state.

For Wells Fargo and Morgan Stanley, the changes will go into effect on July 1.

Bank of Americas Merrill Lynch said that it has expanded its list of medical services eligible for travel reimbursement to include cancer treatment, organ transplants, reproductive healthcare (including abortion) and mental health conditions.

In an industry already struggling with a lack of talent and a history of homogeneity, ignoring the current climate could be at a firms own peril, some observers say.

I do think it will change how female job-seekers approach their careers and location, said Arnet-Valega. I would not work for a company that does not support womens choice, and I would guide my four daughters to choose their employers and location taking into account the firm or organizations opinion on respecting a womans right to choose."

Leaders need to decideif they care about their employees and colleagues, and whether they are willing to be the type of leader who makes people feel seen and valued the type of leader who people want to work for, said Gagnon. Because the next generation of our workforce is not going to settle for less.

I think many companies want tosay the right things, said Gerber. But I think saying the right things and doing the right things are different things. I think there's a difference between crafting a great message and then a company saying to its female employees today that, no matter what, I'm going to make sure that you don't have this problem. That's what employees want to hear.

I do think in our industry, we represent trillions of dollars in assets and have tons of power that we don't use, he added, saying that he has personally put pressure on companies his firm is investing with to take a public position against the Dobbs decision.

We are in an industry known for staying quiet, wrote Storjohann and Hummel, a point of view reinforced by the lack of response from dozens of firms that were approached for this story.LPL, Raymond James, Edward Jones and Cetera were among the many firms that had not responded to questions regarding any corporate response to the decision by press time.

It is time to expand the table, invite in other voices, and find solutions that we simply cannot create by sitting in a circle with people who only look like us, they said.

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The Economics of Abortion in a Post-Roe World – The Dispatch

Posted: June 22, 2022 at 11:29 am

Since a draft opinion written by Justice Alito indicating that the Supreme Court would overturn Roe v. Wade was leaked, much of the debate has been philosophical, dealing with womens bodily autonomy versus the rights of the unborn, and what kind of different laws states might pass now that that the issue of abortion has been returned to elected officials. However, its also an issue with economic consequences. State-level abortion bans will affect the economy as a whole and women in particular in several different ways.

What effect, exactly, does legal abortion have on womens ability to partake in the economy?

This is a tricky question. One may think that studying womens labor force participation, salaries, and years of education before and after Roe v. Wade would provide some clues, but correlation does not equal causation. Many things changed during the 1970s that affected womens roles in the economy. Abortion is one variable, but attributing the entire post-1973 rise in womens labor force participation to legal abortion would be intellectually dishonest.

In recent decades, economists have approached this is through so-called natural experiments: Five states and the District of Columbia had already legalized abortion before Roe v Wade. Comparing the outcome for women in these states after abortion was legalized compared to the rest of the country (or comparing each state to a similar state that did not have legal abortion pre-Roe) can, at least in theory, allow us to isolate the effect that abortion legalization has on women in the economy and society as a whole.

Using this method, legalizing abortion reduced the number of teen mothers by 34 percent and teen brides by 20 percent, while maternal mortality among black women decreased by 30 to 40 percent.

Meanwhile, using the same methodology, economic researchers have found that legalized abortion increased womens schooling and employment rates, as well as labor force participation in general (especially for black women). Legal abortion also increased the share of women working in jobs covered by social security.

Given that natural experiments are held in high regard for their ability to establish causation rather than just correlation, one may think that this would settle the topic. Things, however, are more than a tad more complicated.

The main flaw with relying on these studies as an indicator for what kind of effect reversing Roe v. Wade may have on women is that they all rely on very old data. In 1970, an unplanned pregnancy that led to a woman becoming a single mother was devastating. The stigma was severe. There were few options for single mothers to continue with their education, at least not without relying on help from family, and single motherhood stifled career options. While there is little doubt that motherhood still imposes a cost on womens earnings and career prospects, this cost is not nearly as great as it was 50 years ago.

A half-centuryago, women who became pregnant out of wedlock faced immense social pressure to marry the father (though to be fair, men were also reluctantly marched down the aisle in shotgun weddings). This affected their economic outlook because marriage bars were still common. Such bars were outlawed by Title VII of the 1964 Civil Rights Act, but it took time for employers to change their attitudes. An accidental pregnancy that caused a spontaneous, socially mandated wedding could very well force a woman out of the labor force. This is no longer the case.

Furthermore, discrimination against pregnant women remained legal until 1979. At the time Roe v. Wade was decided, a woman could still be fired legally if she became pregnant. This is part of what drove demand for abortion among educated women, as pregnancies were fully capable of ending promising careers. While no one can say that pregnancies do not affect career development, it is nowhere near as severe today as it was back then.

The second problem with these studies that are meant to instill the notion that a return to a pre-Roe America would be devastating to women in the economy, is that natural experiments by their very nature struggle with finding a proper control group. Out of the five jurisdictions) that had legalized abortion prior to Roe, four of themAlaska, California, New York and Hawaiihad and still have economies that look rather different from the rest of the country (the control group), with the latter three having a far greater service and professional sector than most other states. This is relevant as pregnancies and marriage mainly caused career disruption (or worse) to women in these sectors. It is quite likely that the natural experiments overstate the effect, as the control and treatment groups are not actually identical.

Third, in addition to changes in cultural attitudes toward single mothers and mothers in the workforce, technology has also made it easier to combine parenting with working. The pandemic has given a significant boost to the already-increasing number of remote jobs, which makes it easier for mothers to stay in the labor market.

Fourth, women have far greater access to contraceptives than they did in 1970. Abortion bans are almost certainly going to lead to changes in sexual behavior and risk-taking that were frankly not possible for many Americans back in 1970 when access to contraceptives was far more limited. This will also mitigate the actual impact of any restriction on abortion.

Finally, the pre-Roe abortion bans were far more effective than any modern abortion ban could realistically be. Out of the five states, only oneNew Yorkallowed non-state residents to have abortions. Pre-Roe, if you lived in a state without legal abortion, you could not simply travel to a state where it was legal, as you had to prove residency to be allowed to have an abortion in any of those states except New York. While more than half the states are likely to either ban or restrict abortion, those who do allow it are almost certainly going to allow abortion tourism. The effect of abortion bans on women will be smaller because the bans will be less effective (though traveling out of state will be admittedly be more difficult for poorer women).

And this brings us to the real, significant issue that pro-lifers now have to tackle: A post-Roe America needs to become a better place to have a family, and in particular a better place to be a mother. There is an image of Republicans as caring about babies only as long as they are in the womb, subsequently abandoning vulnerable mothers after persuading (or forcing) them not to have abortions. Even if this image is not entirely justified, more must be done to combat it. An America where becoming a mother is an unattractive option will never be able to enforce a ban on abortion.

To start with, a post-Roe America needs legally mandated, paid maternity leave. Only 25 percent of American workers in the private sector work for employees that offer paid parental leave (maternity, paternity or both). The loss of income from taking care of a newborn is a deterrent to having children, and indirectly provides an incentive to violate any ban on abortion. Family leave can be a contentious issue for conservatives, but Donald Trump signed a bill providing for paid parental leave for federal workers during his administration, and this is something that ought to be extended to private sector employees. (Abby McCloskey has written about a proposal that could enjoy bipartisan support for The Dispatch.)

Second, the cost of maternity care needs to be drastically reduced, and ideally such care should be unconditionally free. The prospect of going bankrupt or being indebted for life from medical debt stemming from a potentially complicated childbirth makes abortion more attractive. Even without a European-style universal health care system in the U.S., there are ways to address this, whether by increasing government subsidies to ACA plans, allowing all plans to provide maternity care without deductibles and co-insurance, or by funding maternity care through a separate program.

Its best to think of children as a public good. Everyone, even the childless, benefit or will benefit from children being born today, as we all eventually end up relying on the existence of future generations, both to provide caretakers and to keep entitlements such as Social Security and Medicare solvent. The U.S. allows its childfree population to free-ride on the parentsenjoying all the benefits of children being around, while carrying hardly any of the costs.

Third, the cost of domestic adoptions must be drastically reduced, and funding for family and child protective services drastically increased. While there is little doubt that CPS agencies often display misguided priorities and in some cases need to be reined in, there is also little doubt that fighting child abuse and neglect is costly. In places where abortion is no longer legal, many more women will inevitably end up giving birth to children they either do not want or are not capable of taking care of. While tax credits cover some of the costs of adoption, couples looking to adopt still have to make significant upfront payments before getting those credits (which again, only cover some of the costs). CPS agencies need to have the resources necessary to monitor and ensure the welfare of at-risk children.

A great danger with the reversal of Roe v. Wade is that Republicans, many of whom have merely paid lip service to the pro-life cause, will fail to understand or fail to accept the magnitude of changes that will need to be made to successfully transition America into the post-Roe era. The backlash may be severe, and the long-awaited overturning of Roe v. Wade could quickly turn into a pyrrhic victory for the pro-life movement, killing its political credibility for time eternal. Pro-life groups, having spent half a century lobbying for the appointment of anti-abortion judges, must now turn their focus to ensuring politicians make the practical changes necessary to make a pro-life America feasible.

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Susan Said She Hopes I Get Hit By A Car?: Discussion Ensues After Woman Shares How Being The Only Single Childless Person At Work Is Wild – Bored…

Posted: June 20, 2022 at 2:19 pm

In the old days, there was a tradition in many countries, and even an official rule, that after reaching a certain age, people who did not start a family or have children were subject to a special tax or paid fines. Today, our society has come very far from such views, and sometimes family people envy their single friends.

Of course, we in no way want to say that family and children are bad. On the contrary, its amazing, but lets admit to ourselves can any mother or father say theyve never dreamed for a moment of returning to their childless days for at least a couple of hours? They definitely have.

Just recently, blogger McErin wrote a tweet that literally confirms what we have already said. The woman is the only one in her office who is not married and has no children, and when colleagues discussed a bunch of family matters over the past weekend, she simply told them that she went to the farmers market and thats it. As the original poster wrote, after her words, three of her coworkers gasped and one even cried

The tweet almost immediately went viral, with 212.5K likes and 10.1K retweets so far. And, well, almost a thousand people decided to share similar stories from their own experience.

More info: Twitter

Image credits: Roger Mommaerts (not the actual photo)

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In her article Advantages and Disadvantages of Being Childfree on the Psychology Today website, Ph.D. Ellen Walker lists three major benefits of being childless. First, you have time for self-care and for other relationships. Second, you can dedicate your time to your career or to other interests that will help the world as a whole.

Finally, the world will be less crowded and resources less depleted. However, this position also has its own disadvantages its just that at certain moments, the benefits are more noticeable.

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By the way, the Original Poster herself noted that her initial tweet should be taken as nothing more than an attempt to perceive the situation with humor. The fact is that, as is often the case on the internet, a heated argument broke out in the comments between staunch childfree people and adherents of traditional family values.

Image credits: Marco Zanferrari (not the actual photo)

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In fact, the most important thing here is to have respect for those who one position or another, and try not to judge people simply because their lifestyle or beliefs do not match yours. As one of the authors comments wrote, I like that I have a family, but I totally respect those who do not want to have children.

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Leslie-Ashburn Nardo, a psychology professor at Indiana University, co-wrote an academic study on this very topic. Relative to targets who had chosen to have two children, voluntarily childfree women and men were penalized by perceivers, says professor Nardo.

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Specifically, they were perceived as leading less fulfilling lives than do people who had chosen to have children, notes Nardo. Moreover, their decision to forgo parenthood, arguably individuals most personal choice, evoked moral outrage anger, disgust, and disapproval. Actually, it is believed that parents attempts to self-realize through their own children harm not only the kids, but also the parents themselves.

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By the way, sometimes it happens that people who decide not to have children become active pet lovers, and even replace parenthood with them. Sometimes this leads to funny situations for example, as with this dog mom, the heroine of this post on Bored Panda. And we, as usual, highly appreciate your comments and our own stories on this topic.

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Susan Said She Hopes I Get Hit By A Car?: Discussion Ensues After Woman Shares How Being The Only Single Childless Person At Work Is Wild - Bored...

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What’s a DINK? Here’s what its like to be a couple that revels in having ‘dual income, no kids’ – Yahoo Philippines News

Posted: June 5, 2022 at 2:16 am

What is a DINK? Some couples are embracing a childfree life where they have more control over what their income covers. (Photo: Carly Caramanna)

We've all seen the memes ... and even the bumper stickers. Colorful displays proclaiming "I'm a FUNCLE," or celebrating being mom to "fur babies" only. There are countless ways some share that they're enthusiastically certain they are living their best life thanks to being childfree. And once these happy souls, of which, I am one, find a partner, there's another term that comes into play: DINK.

What's a DINK? It's an acronym that stands for "dual income, no kids," and is widely interpreted as two people living together as partners with no children of their own (and no plans to have kids) who are thriving in their careers and personal lives.

The origins of the clever acronym aren't clear and it's not a term frequently mentioned in popular culture, but, like The Goonies, G.I. Joe figurines and the Walkman, the phrase is said to have been coined in the 80s, particularly during the rise of yuppie (young urban professional) culture.

If you were a fan of the 90s animated television series, Doug, you may even remember the Funnies' lovable neighbors, Bud and Tippi Dink. Yes, their surname is a reference to that DINK: The series creator, Jim Jinkins, even confirmed it in a 2016 Decider interview.

The stigma placed around one's very personal decision about whether or not to have children is likely why the term floats so far below the radar but the DINK community is a proud one complete with their very own symbol emblazoned on bumper stickers.

My husband and I do not consider ourselves to be selfish individuals, but instead, we are selfish with the time we have together for the sake of our relationship. For us, that means not having children. (Photo: Carly Caramanna)

I would know. I'm a proud DINK. My husband and I are both in our late 30s and have chosen the DINK life and no, we aren't those "married to our career" types. While we both enjoy success in our fields, we enjoy a deep bond that I can't imagine would be possible if I had to give so much of myself to caring for a child. We are not selfish individuals, but instead, selfish with the time we have together for the sake of our relationship.

Don't get me wrong, we love children and have great relationships with our many younger extended family members and the children of close friends. In fact, with the extra time (and money) we have from not having children of our own, we have the ability to forge extra-special bonds with these children in our lives.

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My husband and I share a love of travel and are able to explore for a good chunk of the year, including several trips a month and at least one long-term international trip a year all on our own dime (no trust funds here). With our jobs, we also typically spend a few months a year living in Los Angeles to work on our creative endeavors. Simply put: We love the lives we have proudly designed for ourselves and have a darn good time along the way. Most importantly, we feel fulfilled in every sense of the word.

In recent times, I've discovered that we're not alone. In addition to circles of friends that share this similar mindset, there's an entire online community dedicated to removing the pressures and stigmatism surrounding the subject.

Dania Casellas, a 33-year-old microbiologist and online fitness coach, resides in Florida with her partner. Together, they have created a safe and inspiring space on Instagram for others like them to share the daily humorous (and often reluctant) encounters they face as DINKS.

"I knew in my early 20s that I for sure had no desire to have kids," Casellas tells Yahoo Life. "I don't get excited over babies but I'm good with kids. I have a silly personality and enjoy being around them but taking on the huge responsibility of raising someone just doesn't appeal to me. I was told I was crazy, selfish and that I would regret it. I'm now 33, childfree and living my best life."

That best life she speaks of? Casellas spent years living in New York City on a journey of self discovery and she and her partner now enjoy the spontaneity that DINK life brings, like making last-minute dinner plans, playing in soccer leagues and taking trips to Universal Studios Orlando.

"I think having kids would limit us in the activities we enjoy and the quiet living space we love," Casellas adds. "We hope to be homeowners soon. With the way things are right now, I'm not sure we could afford a home and kids. Adulting is expensive."

As today's society continues to see a growing number of issues on the rise overall uncertainty, crippling debt, a poor housing and job market and even climate change financial, cultural and biological issues come into play when considering parenthood.

Still, arriving at the decision to not have children wasn't easy given the social pressures she faced. "I'm basically the only childfree-by-choice person I know outside of social media," Casellas shares. "Friends and family around me were starting families and honestly I almost started to doubt my choice. I needed support so I started listening to books about being childfree by choice." She credits books like A Childfree Happily Ever After: Why More Women are Choosing Not to Have Childrenby Tanya Williams with making peace with her decisions, as well as the discovery of social media communities.

"When I discovered people sharing their childfree lives on Instagram, I felt like I was going to therapy," she says. "Childfree people absolutely live healthy, fulfilling and purposeful lives. It's an amazing and supportive community to be a part of."

Childfree Millennial is another Instagram-based DINK support system, run by partners Marcela and Michael, ages 26 and 31 respectively, who live in Kansas City, Missouri and prefer to keep their last names anonymous.

"It was about three years ago that I came to the realization and had a light bulb moment that kids weren't a mandatory thing in life," Marcela says. "Crazy, I know I just didn't grow up being told this or having any examples of people who didn't have kids in their 20s and 30s."

"When I had this epiphany," she continues, "I couldn't contain my excitement because of how relieved I was. I wasn't going to have to do something that I had been dreading my entire teenage and adult years."

Today, Marcella says she wakes up every day with a smile on her face knowing she can confidently accomplish all that she sets out to do. "I find myself investing more in creativity, exploring the world and becoming a better person," she says.

She uses her platform as a way to let others know it's OK. "Three years ago, I wish I had someone to look up to like me in the childfree space," she explains. "Someone who was open in talking about their childfree journey and how amazing and inspiring your life can be, regardless of what others are saying about it."

If you see a decal like this on a nearby car, you're probably encountering a DINK. (Photo: Rachel Wiedmayer)

As many work toward removing the stigma of going childfree, proud DINKS are not shy when it comes to displaying their status. One way of letting the world know where you stand in the child department is the popular trend of displaying a bumper sticker outlining your "family." On a DINK's car, those stick figure children are are depicted as little money bags.

Rachel Wiedmayer is one of the top-rated sellers of DINK bumper stickers on her Etsy store, WiedMakers. "I am half of a DINK couple," Wiedmayer says. "My husband and I do not (and will not ever) have children of the human variety. We have two dogs and a cat. I decided to start selling these decals because I look for designs that align with my views and interests."

And there are obvious financial benefits along the way to not having children. According to the U.S. Department of Agriculture, it is projected that it will cost parents, on average, $233,610 to raise a child born in 2015.

Jay Zigmont is founder of financial planning service Childfree Wealth and author of Portraits of Childfree Wealth. Zigmont focuses his client base almost exclusively on childfree couples, a trend he believes we can expect to see more of since, as the number of childfree families grows, so does the need for financial plans that aren't tailored towards those with children.

Jay Zigmont works as a financial planner for childfree couples, a trend he says is growing. (Photo: Jay Zigmont)

"Financial planning for childfree individuals is different," Zigmont explains. "Most financial rules of thumb or general plans assume you have children. With 11% of the U.S. population over age 55 being childfree (and that number growing in younger generations), we as financial planners need to be sure to adjust to this growing need."

It's not all yachts and spontaneous international travels for this growing number of individuals. "Being childfree does not automatically mean you are rich," adds Zigmont. "The difference is that if a childfree person is barely keeping their head above water, if they had a kid they would drown."

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What's a DINK? Here's what its like to be a couple that revels in having 'dual income, no kids' - Yahoo Philippines News

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Back In High School, Her Boyfriend Gave Up 2 Children For Adoption But He Kept This A Secret From Her – Chip Chick

Posted: May 31, 2022 at 2:37 am

A 29-year-old woman thought she knew everything there was to know about her boyfriend, but she recently learned he kept an enormous secret from her throughout the duration of their 2-year relationship.

She and her boyfriend have both agreed to remain childfree. She doesnt want kids of her own, as she had to raise her 8 younger siblings all alone, and quite frankly, that was enough parenting for her.

Shes looking forward to now being able to live her life on her own terms and do whatever she wants.

My boyfriend is child-free because he said he never wanted kids and never saw himself as a dad, she explained.

He was the one to even initiate the topic saying it was important that he not enter a relationship with someone that wanted kids which I loved since before him EVERY single guy Ive ever been with wanted children so I just felt like I would have to compromise and have kids in order to experience that love.

A month ago, she found out that her boyfriend is hardly childfree. She began noticing that her boyfriend was doing his best to prevent her from seeing what he was doing on his phone, and he was no longer answering calls in front of her.

Then, she saw one evening on his laptop that he was talking to a guy named Ben and some girl in a group chat.

As she flipped through the messages between her boyfriend, Ben, and this girl, she was shocked to see that the people her boyfriend had been speaking to were referring to him as their dad.

She kept digging and found out that Ben was 12 and had reached out to her boyfriend first, claiming to be his son.

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Back In High School, Her Boyfriend Gave Up 2 Children For Adoption But He Kept This A Secret From Her - Chip Chick

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"Am I Wrong For Not Attending My Daughter’s Gender Reveal For Her …

Posted: May 25, 2022 at 4:10 am

Its no secret that more and more people are choosing to live childfree. If youre new to the topic and would like to find out why exactly people make such a seemingly unusual decision, and what they think of it when theyre 50 and older, read our articles here and here.

This story comes from a 48-year-old mother to a 23-year-old daughter who decided to remain childfree for multiple reasons. Instead, the daughter has a blue-tongued skink who she heavily adores wrote mom in a recent post on r/AITA that amassed 18.5k upvotes. The family drama started after mom got a text asking if Id come to her gender reveal party she was having. And it turns out, she was less than excited with the invitation.

Read the full story right below, to find out if the mom came (spoilers: she didnt see the point!) and be sure to check out what the people in the community had to comment about the whole incident.

One mom has recently shared how her childfree daughter invited her to her skinks gender reveal party, to which she blatantly refused

Image credits: JoshBerglund19 (not the actual photo)

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"Am I Wrong For Not Attending My Daughter's Gender Reveal For Her ...

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Childfree Humor: 35 Jokes And Memes By People Who Don’t Regret Their Childfree Lifestyle – Bored Panda

Posted: at 4:10 am

A Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report found that the US birth rate fell by 4% from 2019 to 2020, the sharpest single-year decline in almost 50 years, and the lowest number of births since 1979. With more and more people passing on the prospect of having children, childfree people are still seen with a fair share of stigma by society.

With so much pressure to experience parenthood and the joys and challenges that come with it, people who consciously choose not to do so have to find ways to build resilience and inner strength to stand up for themselves.

One such way is not taking things too seriously to begin with. Just like this Facebook page titled Childfree Humor which is created for people who don't care much for kids and want to have a laugh about it.

The page is home to almost 94k followers and it even has a humorous Etsy shop with bold and sarcastic childfreedom-related shirts. Scroll down below through a selection of Childfree Humor posts that range from painfully hilarious to all too relatable.

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Childfree Humor: 35 Jokes And Memes By People Who Don't Regret Their Childfree Lifestyle - Bored Panda

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